Kagabi ay hindi ako makatulog

Lagi kong naiisip na ang klase

Ko ay KINDERGARTEN

Mga bubwit, mga babies

Mga iyakin at uhugin

Naghanda ako na parang Zombie

Matagal na kase akong hindi

Nagturo ng mga batang

Kapuputol palang ang cord

Bumiyahe nang wala sa sarili

8:00 na! Mag linya at itaas ang signboard

K/1 Room 102,  Ms. Toquero

May isang cute na bibong little girl

Sumunod naman ang isang boy

Na parang trumpo, nahilo na ako

Isang girl na umiyak nang 10 minuto

Tapos tumatawa habang paakyat

Eto na! Simula na ng true colors

Pinalinya sa labas ng pinto

Sumunod, okey alright

Introduce thyself

Games, Hokey Pokey

Drawing dito

Coloring na drama

Enjoy sila, enjoy din ako

May na- late, halos mahimatay

Nang pumasok, cute na bata

Pero ang Nanay madakdak

Keso daw maoospital siya

Eh bakit naka- halter siya?

Umiiyak na bata

Hindi sumasagot

Ayaw magsulat

Inalok ng snacks

Ilang milya ang ngiti

Isa pa ang pumasok

Nakahelmet at patalon talon

Hello ng Hello

Inuulit lahat ng sabihin ko

Isa ka sa target ko

Half day na ang lumipas

Hindi pa kumpleto ang klase

Malamang bukas

Mas maraming iiyak.

Tatawa at "May I have a snack?"

Paalam time na

Hindi ako pagod sa isip

Pero ang sakit ng paa ko

Sa paglalaro,pakendeng

Enjoy kami, magandang araw

Unang araw sa eskwela

Nangangapa, dapat maging mas bata

Huwag masyadong seryoso

Gaya sa mga naunang tigre

Este sa mga dating estudyante

Panibagong araw bukas

Pink outfit naman ang isusuot ko

At naka headband (uso ngayon)

Para masabihan na naman ako ng

"You are prettyl, Ms. T"

.................... Kindergarten pa lang, marunong nang mambola, nagpapabola naman ako....................

Standing in a corner of my room

Thoughts swirling in my head

They said Monday, I will teach 2nd grade

Tuesday, changed to first grade

Then today I was assigned to kindergarten

Pissed because of confusion

Mix up of materials inside the room

Had to find tiny chairs

for their tiny tush to fit in

Cursing under my breath

September 5, official start of the year

New students I don't even have single clue

Anxiety, yes. undue stress, yes

Excitement, MORE!

Left the room sunny yellow

Went on the train to Manhattan

Got off at 14th street

Inside Strand, like a dog

Smelling peanut butter

Searched education books

Picked up one, two, three

And one cute magnetic book

All at once I was planning already

To entice them, motivate

that school is fun, I can be fun!

I may have been upset because of the chaos

The school brougt me at the last minute

But deep inside I am glad, relieved

Getting new faces thus new slates

High hopes and a slight tinge

of Innocence

................. And so on September 5th. my journey with my first Kindergarten Special Education Class in NYC Begins......................

Today I saw my student whose mother was murdered last week. It was horrific because it was his father who did it.

I called him and he came rushing. He hugged me. I wanted to say so many things. Words I practiced and memorized in my head but none came out.

I just held him so tight, not wanting to let him go. The he looked into my eyes and said,

"Ms. T. If I want to talk to you. Can I come to your classroom? I hope you will not be so busy"

"Of course" Finally I was able to say something.

He ran to his classmates.

I walked in the hallway, with my heart beating so fast

And a drop of tear fell on my cheeks.

A little boy walks in the room

"Silent type", eyes filled with eagerness

I looked at him secretly

I sensed something

Something is different with this boy

I said hello, smiled and directed him to a seat

He looked up to me and said "Thank You Teacher"

Courteous and confident, carries himself with eloquence

With charming and subtle hint of naughtiness

Interesting, endearing, a warning sign indeed

I tried to avoid that warning sign

No, I must not, I am his teacher

I must be fair, to all, teach without any attachment

I guess he got me, with that smile

And that trademark stare, those inquisitive eyes

See, this boy wants to learn everything about anything and anyone

He has so much passion, the will to explore as many worlds possible

He asks questions, endless ones which I answered with my best 

To feed his hunger for facts or else he will be silent

I am afraid of this silence because it means he is not satisfied

He was like a sponge, absorbs

Quick to learn, logical at such young age

You can not fool him

He is a grown man inside a boy's system

And so I treated him as one

One afternoon, he got into mischief

and that means a time out facing the wall

I expected a tantrum, a refusal

But no, he went to the corner quietly

And with his friend, started this unforgettable conversation

"I told you we should not have done that"

"Now where are we?"

"We are in a dark corner, while all the rest is learning"

"I don't like it, do you?"

"I think we better behave, I don't like time outs"

I wanted to laugh, look at those lonely eyes

I wanted to hold him, to smile and say it's alright

Wanted to shorten the time out

But I have a role, the navigator of the ship

Rules are rules, he too must abide

He learned so fast,

That I needed to hunt

For new materials

I know he would devour

Like a lion, high and mighty

But one day, Teacher had to leave

Abruptly, for reasons unexplainable

It broke my heart, I wanted to say goodbye

Answer his questions why I had to go

And to have a last look of his face, smile and those eyes

I mourned for days

Not seeing my class

Him, his best friend

I worried, I felt guilty

For leaving him so soon

But I realized I forgot something

He had confidence in me

He trusted me with his learning

He put me in the highest pedestal

Then why shouldn't I do the same?

I recall the time I shared with him,

The most valuable lesson in life

I follow it to a T until this day

"When you are given intelligence,

the more humility you should have"

I just rephrased Socrates' Philosophy

" A wise man admits that he knows nothing"

When I said those words, I knew at that moment

He will live his life with dignity, with honor

Humility and the will with the highest intensity

Time passes

 And I grow old

Teaching has been my life

And each student

Etches a mark on my being

They may have forgotten about me

But I never will,  for I knew them

I know their journey, their first one

To become functional individuals

He is one I shall always remember

I taught him from books

But he taught me compassion

Patience to answer

To smile more often!

And to face life like an endless learning

I am now in a different place

Far far away from him

But as each school year starts

I wait at the door

Waiting for new students to come in

Greeting them, smiling

Telling them where to sit

But somehow, I find myself

Looking at their eyes

Perhaps, maybe

I will find a pair of eyes just like his

* This is dedicated to you, OZNE. In the future, read this so you will remember what you taught me.

 Teaching the unconventional way
Marcello and I attended a birthday party of one of our friends. We talked about how much we look forward to our summer vacation. Lynne and I started already reminiscing our experiences with our students, how in September that we wished they were absent but today, we are missing them so much already. Being a teacher, we can't help but be attached to them, especially the ones who have difficulty learning and who gave us a hard time. For 5 days in week, we become their second parents. Much of their values are molded by us and we have the great responsibility to guide them in preparing for the real life. Lynne and I are special education teachers, we have a tough class with students with various learning disabilities, behavioral and emotional deficits. We showed our dismay, frustration, impatience, rigidness and at times apathy. But in the most part of the ten months we taught them, the mask of a teacher comes off and we show concern, the time to listen to their incomprehensible stories, celebrate their small victories and lift their spirits up when they fail. In lay man's term, we have grown to love them, skills and flaws included. Ronie who teaches in high school was so proud that his "repeaters' class" passed the Regents Test except for one. His method of teaching required no explanations, no lengthy monologues or impossible to solve problems. Instead he took 2 sample questions from past tests and he made sure it was so easy that even a kindergarten can answer, The result, all the students always aced his quizzes. They said it was the first time they scored so high. Ronie needed no magic trick but he made them BELIEVE in themselves that through small increments, they can progress to more challenging ones.It was strategy on how to attack a test that he taught them, not to be daunted when a question is posted in front of them. The irony of it is, the school intends to investigate it as suspected rampant cheating. I myself call it utterly ridiculous. There were only 30 students and 20 proctors plus they were seating one chair apart from each other. It is so sad that the institution itself doubts that these so called "at risk" students can succeed and will not drop out because ONE TEACHER had FAITH in them. A school cannot be called a school unless it prides itself in aiming that every student will achieve and that FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION. I commend him and said just "f *** the admin, they do not know any better". I bet that his students will never forget him. As another school year ends, I try to recall the unconventional ways I did to change not only the cognitive skill but the socio- emotional aspects. I vividly remember one.............. C came to me crying and said "Ms. T, the kids are teasing me, they call me Big Head. They do not want me near them." I did not say anything and I waited until all my students were in the meeting area. I waited for someone to tease C and eventually in a 1.5 second, I heard C shouted "Ms. T, he called me Big Head!": I looked into his eyes and said "You have a big head, yes that is true so what is your problem?" He retorted and said "But they kept teasing me!". I then I said in front of the class." Look C, when you have a big head, it means you have a bigger brain, you are smarter" Then I saw the look of embarrassment on the faces of his classmates and then what was funny was that they started touching/ measuring their own heads. Then I looked at C, he was beaming with pride and from then on, confidence and self- control flowed through him. Students may forget teachers but we never forget our students, Their struggle was also ours, their pain we felt and pride we showed when they succeed, In their victory, we stay in the shadows for teachers are the invisible agents of change in a student's life.... He then can choose which path he will follow. *** for my class of two years, you all showed great leaps of improvement*** I