Yesterday, I went to my first Catholic mass since I got here. It was reassuringly familiar. It came with all the usual Catholic accessories that I had up to now taken for granted: the stations of the cross, pictures and statues of saints, no cushions on the pews, kneely thingys on the pews, a tabernacle, them little red candles – no stained glass windows though. The only strange thing was the fact that the priest was Nigerian. It was kind of funny because he sounded exactly like Tommy Tiernan's (controversial Irish comedian) impression of an African priest (Zebidiah, cum dowun frum dat tree!) I think Catholicism has come full circle here and is a vision of things to come in Ireland. Only 3% of the population of South Carolina is Catholic and Catholics have a very bad rep around here. They're kind of seen as fundamentalists I think. All these years we've been sending white missionaries over to Africa to convert the 'natives' and now they're coming back to convert us back. Funny how what goes around comes around!

Last night I went to a barbeque with some Irish people outside in the courtyard of Rainbow Court (the courtyard is just a carpark and there's a patch of sandy grass with some picnic tables and barbeque grills. It was the first time since I got here that I sat down and actually had a meal with a group of Irish people. I had two chicken fillets and two burgers. I was stuffed but there's people dying in Africa - can't let it go to waste doncha know?

In yet another fit of spontanaeity, I have modified my travel plans yet again. Here is my updated itenerary. I have included links to some sattelite maps of the routes I will take and info on how long it will take to get there by bus etc. so that you can get a better idea of where I'm going geographically.

Tonight I leave Myrtle Beach at 7:05PM and will travel by bus up to Asheville, North Carolina. I will arrive there at 10:25AM the following morning and I will stay with Kevin (who I was hanging out with all summer) and his wife there for a few days. Here's a link to a map:

http://www.google.com/maps?f=d&hl=en&saddr=Myrtle+Beach&daddr=Asheville&ie=UTF8&t=h&om=0

Then on Thursday night at 9:30PM I will leave Asheville and travel by bus to Atlanta, Geogia. I will arrive there at 4:45AM the following morning and will stay with Tyler for a few days. Here's a link to a map:

http://www.google.com/maps?f=d&hl=en&saddr=Myrtle+Beach&daddr=Asheville&ie=UTF8&t=h&om=0

Then on Sunday night I will leave Atlanta and travel back to Myrtle Beach by bus, arriving there at 10:55AM the following morning. Here's a link to a map:

http://www.google.com/maps?f=d&hl=en&saddr=Myrtle+Beach&daddr=Asheville&ie=UTF8&t=h&om=0

Then I will leave Myrtle Beach the next morning and fly to Washington DC where I will get a connecting flight to New York where I will stay for five days before flying home. Here are two links to maps of this leg of the journey:

http://www.google.com/maps?f=d&hl=en&saddr=Myrtle+Beach&daddr=Asheville&ie=UTF8&t=h&om=0

http://www.google.com/maps?f=d&hl=en&saddr=Myrtle+Beach&daddr=Asheville&ie=UTF8&t=h&om=0

I'm really excited about it. I'm leaving tonight all of a sudden! The joy of travel is coursing through my veins again and I feel like I did in Cork airport two months ago - but not as aprehensive because now I know that I am perfectly capable of navigating airports and collecting baggage and all that stuff - and I have friends waiting for me everywhere I go so I'm really looking forward to it. The bus rides will be insanely long - longer than my flight to America - but I'll sleep and read and the buses are meant to be fairly comfortable. I'll be travelling mostly by night so hopefully I can just relax and catch some shut-eye. I've got to go buy my tickets now and then I have to pack and have a big dinner. So long Myrtle Beach! Eat my dust!

Hey sorry it took so long to write again but it looks like this is going to be the standard regularity for my blog-updating for the forseeable future - about every three days. A few days ago, the air conditioning broke down and it was the most horrible night ever. It was SIGNIFICANTLY cooler outside than inside that night. He sat outside on the porch but eventually had to go inside to go to sleep. If he had any sense we would have brought out a blanket and slept on the porch. It was promptly repaired the next morning though so everything is just dandy again.

More importantly I have been feeling increasingly frustrated with this place over the past few days and I don't feel like I can take any more of Myrtle Beach or Johnny Rockets. All of a sudden I feel like I can't stand the place for another second - I have sucked everything of merit out of this city and there is nothing left here for me. I have been struck by wanderlust again and therefore, out of necessity, I have decided to saddle up and ride off into the sunset again. I realised that eventhough, I had been very intrepid in coming over here all on my own, that I had once again settled into a routine again over here and that is something I dread above all else - the complacency of being stuck in a rut. Therefore, in the spirit of my new 'let's do it' attitude which I have been trying to foster for the past year, I will leave Myrtle Beach behind me. I have no excuse not to because I have saved up enough money to do so. All that was holding me back was fear of the unknown which I feel it is my duty to plunge into. Therefore when my friend Tyler Whatley (the punk rocker I had been hanging out with here for the past few weeks) emailed me a few days ago and invited me to stay with him for a while in Atlanta (probably not expecting me to be spontaneous enough to accept) I thought about it and then caled him to accept. It was really a decision that made itself because I am suddenly unhappy here and all I can think of that would make me happy is some new scenery. I remembered the words of Charles Bukowski in his poem 'Zero': "Perhaps living through these petty days will get us ready for the dangerous ones." This was the attitude I came to Myrtle Beach with. Myrtle Beach was a test I set for myself: Survive on your own with no help from anybody and without any human companionship (unless you pick it up along the way as a result of chance). If I could live through these ultimately petty days in Myrtle Beach, then I could prepare myself for more 'dangerous ones' which might come in the future, days when there was no safety net of home, days when I might have nobody or nowhere to go to when push came to shove, days when unfortunate circumstances dictated that I had to be 100% self-sufficient in terms of my own financial and (more crucially) emotional support. I think I have proved that I can make it on my own to a certain extent. I didn't need to ask my parents for a cent although I did cut my trip short partially because of financial constraints and partially because this place is like a dying plant as the nourishing water of foreign J1ers flowed away. It would have been a withering brown heap of a town by September. These petty days will continue when I go home and move to Dublin where I don't now anyone and will once again start from scratch. I see no point in continuing this test of endurance. I could stay here for another week but I would gain nothing by doing so - I would merely be passing up an opportunity to see another bit of this country and gain a deeper understanding of it. I have become a stronger more independant person having come here but I have also learned something more important that I didn't expect to: 'sometimes you can't make it on your own'. I think I'm beginning to accept this inescapable truth. I didn't really make it on my own over here. I made friends and they helped me along a lot. Without these friends, I don't think life here would have been bearable. It really is true that no man is an island (no matter how hard I try to be) and that I will always need the emotional support of friends and some kind of a rapport with God to get through the 'dangerous' days. And with this realisation, the purpose of my test of endurance has evaporated. Now I can concentrated on seeing some more of this country and meeting some new people and that's really the best part of travel. My remaining time in America is short. I will have five days in Atlanta and five days in New York. I leave for Atlanta in the early hours of Wednesday morning. I will travel by Greyhound bus and the trip will take between nine and eleven hours. I will return in the early hours of the following Monday morning and stay in Myrtle Beach for one night before flying out to New York via Washington DC in the early hours of Tuesday morning. Tonight at work I will inform my manager that I won't be going to work tomorrow and I'm going to take two days off to relax before leaving Myrtle Beach. So that's the plan. I don't know when I'll get the chance to write again. Hopefully I'll update you again before I leave Myrtle Beach. Hopefully I'll get the chance to update in Atlanta but I don't know about New York. I will certainly update when I get settled in again in Ireland. I'll probably write again on Tuesday before I leave. Wish me luck! I'm going to Atlanta!

So yesterday after I finished my last entry we went to dinner in a place which was very amusingly named Fuddruckers. There I ate...wait for it...a half pound ostrich burger!!! Yeah I know!!! Cool!!! Incidentally it was one of the most pleasant dining experiences I have had in the recent past and it tasted quite like an ordinary burger. Then we rented a DVD, (Lord of War starring Nicholas Cage - I would highly recommend this film - it was extremely clever, thought provoking and entertaining - but I digress) and then I set about the business of exchanging email addresses and making my goodbyes. It was a very emotional moment. We were all very sad naturally, but none more than me because I knew in reality that the chances of me ever meeting these people again was very remote and I therefore refused to accept this idea as a possibility. Katy in particular was visibly upset when saying goodbye which I found really touching. They gave me a load of food to take home that they had left over, as if they hadn't done enough for me already.

Today at work was really hard. It was the first morning I had to work without the girls and setting up the patio in the intense heat was the most depressing experience Johnny Rockets has thrown at me so far. I didn't even feel like chopping lemons, which is usually the most sought-after opening job because it means you can sit down and have a chat with your fellow chopper. Nobody chopped any lemons at all. I didn't dance all day and Ms Lucy (one of our managers) very observantly noticed my glum expression, and very intuitively knew that it was because I missed the girls. When the glum expression was still in place several hours later she wondered out loud whether I had 'fallen in love' with one of the girls. That was the only time I've smiled so far all day and I was quite firm in assuring her that I had done nothing so foolish. Then at four o clock I started walking home and stopped by here at the library to write this. Now my time is up so I will go home and later I will play soccer with some Irish lads and two American lads from Johnny Rockets. The standard of soccer will be much higher than previously but the standard of company will be far lower.

On the bright side, the timing of my move couldn't have been better - having to go back to my old apartment now would be so depressing but at least I get on exceptionally well with my new flatmates which I suppose is a silver lining. I've got a 12hour shift tomorrow so I guess I won't check back in until Friday or Saturday. Until then, take care...

  This new apartment is so much cooler than the old one. All my flatmates are dead on. I can get to sleep at night without blaring music, they don't steal food and they're so accommodating. The front door is made of plywood or something and there's a hole in it. Knocking on the door nearly makes it break down. While this could be a little disconcerting, I have instead allowed it to become merely a humorous anecdote to recount to friends and colleagues in years to come over a cup of tea. Also, the previous occupant had drawn cockroaches with a black marker all over the walls, ceiling, floor, TV screen, anywhere really, which would make you feel like you were surrounded by cockroaches if you happened to be under the inebriating influence of some alcoholic beverages. Last night we saw a real cockroach running around on the wall amongst the fake ones and had a good laugh about it.

And in Johnny Rockets news today, I have been learning languages at a ferocious rate. I can now converse competently with the Mexican lad in the kitchen about fast mice and slow pussycatos…ok so I haven't really learned any more Spanish than I already know but I have learned a cupla focal of Russian and Romanian. Russian for no is net and in Romanian it's nooo. Yes is da in Russian and Romanian. 20 and 30 in Romanian are doze itch and trayz itch. Amn't I brilliant now! Last night, just before we closed, a large group of drunk Irish former Johnny Rockets employees (former because they were mostly fired for coming in with hangovers) came in as customers and took over. They put on YMCA, Bad Mama Jama and The Best of The Pogues and jumped up on the counter and started dancing and screaming and singing really badly. One of them wet himself. The few remaining American customers were appalled and complained that they didn't like the atmosphere and demanded that their meal be free. It was so funny. The whole point of Johnny Rockets is that when you pay $7 for your burger, that you get a fun-filled atmosphere in return. Of course usually, this atmosphere is totally artificial and nobody is actually having any fun and you can tell. The American customers seem to be quite happy with this though. Then when a group of people come in and actually create a real genuine atmosphere of fun, the American customers feel alienated by this out-of-control behaviour. They like their fun to be strictly regulated. This prudishness amuses me for some reason and I don't know why but I enjoyed seeing the customers feeling uncomfortable with the unbridled fun that was going on around them.

 On a more sombre note…Today is the American Christians' last day in Myrtle Beach. This is obviously a very sad occasion. Luckily I have the whole day off today and will spend a bit of time with them before they go. I had lunch with them earlier today and they got me a going away present – it was a very nice bible with my name engraved on the front. It was a very touching moment and I felt so bad that they got me something else after everything they had done for me this summer. All I had got them was a card and some fuzzy dice (cos they drove me around so much). I'm having dinner with them later. It will be very sad having to say goodbye to them for ever and ever and ever and…so on. At least now that I've moved in to my new apartment with my new flatmates things won't be so bad without them cos I like hanging out with them – they're interesting conversationalists and it doesn't bother them that I'm not into getting wasted and such.. This is how I feel about goodbyes: When you bond with people and then you have to break that bond, it can be very difficult. Some might say that such difficulty could be avoided by not bonding with them in the first place. But these people are foolish and lonely. If you refuse to gain something for fear of losing it then you cut off your own nose to spite your face. Losing something can be cause a reassuring kind of pain because it confirms that you had attained something very worthwhile. Therefore, creating a tough exterior for yourself and not allowing it to be penetrated is foolish. Perhaps I can clarify my views on this subject by using my fingers as an analogy. The fingers on my left hand are heavily calloused – they are hard and leathery from playing guitar. Years of being cut by guitar strings have made them hard and now they don't get hurt anymore when I play. The fingers on my right hand are soft and sensitive. They may be more susceptible to pain but they are also more sensitive to the warmth of a fire or the softness of a sheepskin rug. The left hand is missing out on all this stuff. I think I'd rather be like my right hand. In conclusion, while I will feel very sad tonight when I say goodbye, paradoxically enough, the fact that I feel sad will make me feel happy that I have met people who I like so much that it makes me feel sad to say goodbye to them… Am I making any sense at all here? I hope so because my hour is up now. Until next time, a bid you adieu!

 Sorry for taking so long to write. Worked a 13hour shift on Saturday (which would be illegal in any other civilized part of the world) and am now working six days a week. Now that Club Boomer has gone out of business, my ability to write blogs is severely curtailed. I have to go to work again in half an hour so this will have to be fairly short. On the upside I have tomorrow off and can hopefully write again. I have so much random news to tell. For example my flatmates went on a casino boat yesterday – they have to go out to international waters to gamble cos it's illegal in South Carolina. You get a free lunch but you usually end up  paying for it with all the money you lose. In other news, one of the black lads who makes the chips in Johnny Rockets is called Sicín (it's spelt differently) which means chicken in Irish. When we explained this to him he was slightly embarrassed. Yesterday, after watching me dance, a customer asked me if I studied dance in Ireland and was that how I managed to acquire this (much coveted;) job?!!! I nearly wet myself laughing. As if you needed any skills to work here!!! Check out the employment poster that go put in the window yesterday (photos section – if it's not up today it will be tomorrow). They finally fired too many people and now they need us!!! Check out the writing – safe clean working environment!!! I fell on my back yesterday and nearly cracked my spine!!! Flexible working hours?! Last night I didn't get out till 1:15AM having been there since 3:30PM!!! The only thing that kept me from killing someone was the fact that I put on the Best of the Pogues on the PA and turned it up full after the customers left and then I got really rowdy with all the other Irish workers as well as one of the black fellas and a Slovakian girl. It cheered me up no end and totally reminded me of the good times I had spent with my band at home going mental to exactly the same songs. I miss that. Speaking of my band, my good friend and bassist has just made a BRILLIANT animation and put it up on the internet. He recorded the music for it and everything with our guitarist. It's a serious look at some Confucian philosophy and the visuals are reminiscent of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and House of Flying Daggers. I know it takes AGES to make these and I know he put LOADS of work into it so if you're interested in philosophy or orientalism, you should really check it out at http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/327567 (click on "watch this video"). Also check out my photo of the car in Rainbow Court with bullet holes around the petrol tank (if it's not up today it will be tomorrow). I noticed a window in Rainbow Court with a bullet hole today too. It's such a lovely place. Speaking of Rainbow Court, I moved today to a new apartment! It's much bigger, more spacious, really NEAT and TIDY!!! And it has two bedrooms – one for the lads and one for the girls! There will be seven of us living there and I know six of those from Johnny Rockets and they're all lovely. The seventh lad seems really nice too on first impression. He said today 'so you don't drink?' (This is the only thing that everyone in Rainbow Court seems to know about me.) I replied 'yeah is that going to be an issue?' (because it really had been here up to now – much more than at home where everyone has gotten over it) He said 'not at all – you're not being frowned upon at all'. That's very reassuring because I know I was being frowned upon very sternly up to now for not drinking here and it made me feel indignant and aggressive for some reason. I think I'm going to be much happier here than I was in my old apartment. That's really important now because all my American friends, who gave me an excuse to do something other than hang out in that nasty apartment, are all leaving on Wednesday morning so I will be without an alternative social outlet outside Rainbow Court for my last two weeks in this town. We went to a place called California Pizza after mass on Sunday and it really felt like the end of an (much too short) era. This place was cool – you could design your own pizza and put whatever you want on it – I got chicken and granny smith apples on mine. No actually it was lovely – yeah ok the apples were a bit weird but I liked it. In the car on the way back, Carolina on My Mind came on and I felt so agonizingly sad. This was my theme song for this summer but the only thing about Myrtle Beach that I will look back on with nostalgia and affection every time I hear this song is the American crowd I spent so much time with. I can't tell you how much I'll miss them. Maybe I'll be able to tomorrow after I see them for the last time ever…:(

This entry has weird colours because I want to make it stand out because this is where you can see all my videos. Here are the links to all the videos I've taken so far in America. I've also put up a video of my band performing in Cork for no particular reason other than perhaps to publicise them and so the Americans among you can see where I'm coming from. You can watch them on the internet but if you want to save them you have to download Google Video which is free and only takes a few seconds. It's well worth taking a look at some of them anyway. The last one is so bad...it really demonstrates what working in Johnny Rockets can be like. It's so hot outside and nobody has the energy to dance - you can't even hear the music. This is my favourite dance but it's unrecognisable from this when I do it. OK well I can't stress enough how much you should look at some of these. There's ones of baseball and one of a Leprechaun and the Kiss Tribute Band performing and everything. Be sure to check out Tyler (it's only 19secs long) - this is the typical vernacular of a young American man - I personally haven't got a clue what he's saying. Just copy and paste the links into your browser's address bar - do I really need to explain that?

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3757322439078394900&q=Tyler&pr=goog-sl

Tyler

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-3993912721817557212&hl=en

Rag Week Undertrads Gig

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6303590788381717100&hl=en

Splish Splash

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7471791599378132851&hl=en

More Fireworks

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6674018161628581968&hl=en

Leprechaun

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7823133004175488834&hl=en

Kiss Army

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=4902880670778191128&hl=en

Fireworks

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4244328363700642439&hl=en

Baseball2

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7622100344791386303&hl=en

Baseball

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5280614133451507975&hl=en

Bad Mama Jama

PS: This is not today's entry - this is just a bonus entry - today's blog entry is directly below this one and be sure to check out today's photos too. The lenghts to which I will go to make my blog as exciting and interactive as possible know no bounds!!!

Two nights ago I did the weirdest thing ever. I dressed up all in black and hopped into the back of a pickup truck with a bag of waterballoons and dirty nappies with the American lads and we went to prank a local rival group of Campus Outreach students. There was a big elaborate plan which was explained to everyone by means of a powerpoint presentation. Everyone had a job. There were scouts who drove around the target and reported back about how many people were around etc. There were maps and photos of the target with arrows and everything. Everyone knew exactly what to do. We would drive up silently, jump out, one squad would start writing slogans on the enemies cars while four other squads (including mine) would set up the launch sites for the water balloons and nappies. At the same time several other squads would be tying ropes to all of the door knobs in the complex in order to lock them in and other squads woudl be pouring syrup on cling film and taping it over the doorframes so that when they came out they would run into them. When everything was in place, stink bombs would be detonated and door-beaters would run past all the doors, beating on them and screaming to wake them up and get them to come out. Then everyone would run to a safe distance and watch as the four launch teams would pelt them with water balloons and nappies from heavy-duty three-man catapults. Then we would all drive away laughing and throwing the last of the water balloons. Or at least that was the plan...It didn't work out exactly like that. First of all they didn't all go to sleep at their usual bedtime (which intelligence had already obtained).Secondly, when they did finally go to bed, and we were about to move in and start stage 1 of Operation Eagle Egg (as it was officially named) two bike cops saw us and made us move along, threatening us with large fines should we attempt to go on the property. I had already warned them that this Operation was criminal in four different ways and that getting caught was really not an option - we were talking trespassing, criminal damage, assault and false imprisonment. So we regrouped at HQ and came up with a plan B - instead of pranking the students from Charlston as originally planned (they were only twenty blocks away), we would drive all the way to Garden City (much much further away) and prank the Minnesota and Atlanta groups. So I got back in the pick up and began a very cold trip to Garden city with the wind flapping my hood in my eyes. We went out in the middle of nowhere where there are no lights but dense forest on either side of the road and a false dawn on the horizon - we really felt like we were on an important mission. When we finally got there at 3AM, we had to start from scratch with no intelligence, so a recon team was sent out to get the lay of the land. When they reported back we were given new positions for the launch sites and everything went off relatively smoothly. As soon as lads started coming out we all legged it having pelted their doors and windows with balloons for several minutes. They were big lads - American football players. We got back into our vehicles and sped away laughing and I managed to hit one of them with a balloon as we passed. They jumped into a truck and started speeding after us!!! We were taking up the rear of the convoy so if anyway was gonna get in trouble it was gonna be us. We had to slow down at a junction and they jumped out of the truck but then the light changed and we got away - they followed us for a few miles but we went really fast and eventually lost them. The mission was a success. But retaliation is expected...I'll keep you posted. It was the coolest thing I did since I got here. I don't know why but it kicked so much ass. We never do stuff like this at home - that's probably why it was so cool - we lost the imagination to come up with such elaborate pranking schemes as this after about our third year in secondary school - I don't know how it happened. But it was good to behave like a rowdy teenager again for one night.

Last night we played soccer again. This time there were way more people - 32. There were way more Irish lads as well so the standard was a lot higher. We ran two eight aside games simultaneously and then the winner played the winner and the loser played the loser. We came out second from the top. We got to use real goals and I was in goal. There weren't any really good shots on goal - most of them went wide. I let in three in the last game but two of them went in off the post (which was my bag - so I think it shouldn't have count) and the last one was when it was too dark to see anything (and I still got a finger to it). It was fun though - and probably the last game I'll get to play over here - there was a good mix of Americans and Irish this time - probably slightly more Americans. Anyway that's all I have time for today - tune in tomorrow when we will be discussing the illusion of reality and which flavour is better; raspberry or strawberry . Cheerio!

   Salutations loyal readers and curious newcomers alike. I have little to report today but as I have the day off and little else to do I thought I'd say hello.

Yesterday I was given only outdoor tables to wait on and due to the fact that there was a thunderstorm, I would have made $0 that day…were it not for my dancing! My antics had not gone unnoticed by the manager and he gave me a new job for that day – I became an entertainer! That was my official job title. An entertainer doesn't make tips but he gets a payrate of $7.50 an hour. Therefore I made about $30 last night but I won't get the paycheck for another two weeks. The only job of an entertainer is to walk around and smile at people and make sure they're happy and play with the kids and distribute paper hats and engage in general goofy behaviour. I have to put on a dance about every 15mins and get up on the tables and convince everyone else to join in and dance with me. Basically it's a lot like the job I already had except without all the actual work… and I get a free t-shirt…or at least I hope it was free.

 I discovered today that my family are printing off each entry in my blog and keeping them in a book to preserve them for posterity. It scared me a little bit to realise that I could be held accountable for my opinions in twenty years time when they may have changed. Well allow me to leave a little memo for myself then…Eoin if you're reading this and it's twenty years from now then you have probably grown complacent with you life and have begun to settle back into the stagnation of routine. WAKE UP!!! What happened to all that youthful bravado eh? What happened to all that get up and go? There's still so much of the world to see so get up off your middle-aged, middle-class ass and do something with what is left of your life… Eh-hem. Thank you for indulging me…Back to the present. Perhaps I'll publish these in a series of memoirs. The series shall be called Eoin's Totally Excellent Adventures and every book will follow the same format but with a different country in every one! Next year it's Australia! I'll tell humorous anecdotes about things that happen to me and people I meet that are merely amusing or interesting on the surface but are also in fact deep insights into the psyche of whatever country it is I'm examining. I think I've struck upon a winning formula wouldn't you agree?

   My dancing escapades in Johnny Rockets continue. Yesterday I was serving a large black family who were rather demanding and relatively unaccommodating until I got out and did She's a Bad Mama Jama. They started taking photos like mad and making unintelligible whoops of (presumably) glee and reveling in the general sense of hilarity that pervades the restaurant whenever I 'do mah thayng'. They continued to laugh all the way through the rest of their meal and upon leaving, tipped me an extra $5 even though they already had to pay a gratuity of around $10 for being such a large group. On another recent occasion, after I had danced on the bar, three old ladies (let's call them the Golden Girls shall we?) who I hadn't even been serving, professed their undying love to me and it was (rather disconcertingly) suggested that I become a professional stripper…Only in America eh?

 But to more pressing matters…I received some rather disturbing news yesterday. Maximus informed me that due to the lack of profit from his Internet Café, he was going to have to go out of business by the end of the week. Naturally I was distraught, having become literally addicted to blog writing. I did my best to dissuade him but failed. This will mean that you will probably have to be content with me updating my blog with less regularity than you have no doubt come to expect from me as I will be limited to the very restrictive opening hours of the library. Furthermore, my entries will probably be much shorter as I will only have an hour to write them. This is most regrettable but unavoidable.

 This is an omen of things to come as I can already see the city beginning to shut down even at this early stage. The internet café, the American students leaving, the Irish students returning home next week to sit their repeats (although I fail to see how they expect to pass this time having done no study) and any Irish students who don't have repeats are no preparing to leave to travel around America for the last few weeks of their stay. Clearly they have the financial backing of their parents as it is simply not financially viable to engage in such travel for several weeks when you're on minimum wage here. Two of my flatmates left last night to spend two days in Florida. They will return but will leave again a few weeks later. My other two flatmates are also contemplating leaving very soon. Last night a disaster was narrowly avoided when two of my flatmates decided not to move out until next week – this will increase our rent to an unaffordable level so I will probably be moving out next week if not the week after. I hope to move into a large seven-person, two-bedroom apartment with four Johnny Rockets workers all of whom are exceptionally nice and two others who I don't know. I really hope this will be possible as these particular work colleagues are very considerate from what I know of them from work. Furthermore, their apartment is very tidy indeed and extremely spacious and most important of all, they label all their food and personal belongings with their name so that other people don't use them without permission. This would be an ideal place for me to live, especially as living conditions in my current abode have become virtually intolerable – it resembles a refugee camp that has been thoughtlessly located right in the middle of a warzone – there are often refugees sleeping on our couch and my flatmates have formed opposing factions and are at war with each other. I have remained neutral – pacifist that I am but it is very difficult to live in this state of war. I hope I can flee the warzone next week but this is reliant on one flatmate in my new prospective flat moving out next week to make room for me – he may not do this until the following week. I have had many kind offers of couches and will not end up on the street. I can sleep anywhere and living on a couch for the limited remaining time I have here would not bother me in the least as I am extremely low maintenance. You shall all be informed of any change of address as soon as it happens. That is all I have for you now. I do not know when I will be able to write again. Do not be surprised if it is very soon or not very soon at all. Keep checking back regularly anyway. Take care…

I had a wonderful night last night. I finally managed to find a little bit of unpretentious culture in this otherwise superficial giant shopping centre known as Myrtle Beach. I got to experience a little American café culture. It’s exactly what I had been looking for all this time and it’s what I love about Cork except that this was way better than cafes in Cork. However, there are cafes on every corner in Cork but there are hardly any here – only bars that don’t open till 4PM. Apparently they are more prevalent in the big cities but Myrtle Beach is not really conducive to establishments which cater for quiet reflection at minimal expense. This place was called The Living Room – it’s a café/bookshop where you can go in, have a cup of tea (five different types including ‘Irish Blend’ and Earl Grey), pick up a book and read it, put it back, surf the net for free on your wireless enabled laptop, listen to some beautiful music being played on a baby grand by a professional pianist and singing from any random customer who wants to go up to the mic and do a bit of crooning. This, incidentally is precisely what I did. I asked him to sing a bit of Tom Waits or Carolina in my Mind but he knew neither and instead asked me to sing a song so I did a Diana Krall number called You Don’t Know Me. I loved that café so much! I would have stayed there all night if it didn’t close. We just sat there and talked and listened to music for ages while I enjoyed a proper cup of tea. I really wish we had somewhere that nice around UCC. This night-time trip to The Living Room was preceded by a kind of social gathering featuring free chocolate cake and apple pie and short comedy performances from Johnny Rockets workers and workers from various other workplaces in Myrtle Beach. It was followed by a water balloon fight in my co-workers’ apartment complex. It was inexplicably, possibly the most enjoyable night I have had since I got here - I don’t know why...

I should probably explain at this point that when I use the word ‘we’ or mention my American co-workers, I am usually referring to the Christian college students who are here in Myrtle Beach on a kind of Bible summer camp if you will. I have been spending quite a bit of time with them over the past few weeks - primarily because when I met some of them at work, they were the nicest people there and I was drawn to them. Since then they have been giving me lifts to work, to mass and all over the place purely out of the goodness of their hearts. I mention this now because I discovered yesterday that they were all leaving next week! I was shocked by how genuinely devastated I was to learn this. They have been an integral part of my life in Myrtle Beach and I really can’t imagine what it will be like without them but I do know that this will be a much bleaker place in their absence. As a rule, I don’t usually write my opinions about specific named people in my blog because I want to avoid inadvertently (or in some cases purposely) defaming people but I’m going to make an exception in this case. I’m sure nobody will hold it against me if I write nice things about them. These people have made my trip to this sleazy superficial den of iniquity actually enjoyable. They are some of the most compassionate, genuine and open people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. In particular, working in Johnny Rockets was made a lot easier by Katie, Sara and Jessi who gave me a lift to work every morning. They work their behinds off every day for crap money and spend as much time silently trying to help out other people as they do doing their own work which is a rare and admirable characteristic to have. They genuinely motivated me to work harder and set an example for me to follow so that I wanted to help other people with their work rather than try to get away with doing as little as possible. In that respect and in others, they have unwittingly made me a better person and for that, I owe them a great debt of gratitude. I hope I’ll be able to keep up the good work when they’re gone. Their friendships and those of the other people in their project have meant more to me than anything else I have acquired in the last month and if their selflessness was representative of the rest of the people in this country (it’s not), then America could rightfully claim to be the greatest nation in the world. They have left me with a good impression of this country, without which I might have returned home with an even more cynical attitude than the one I came here with. They are evidence that even in Myrtle Beach, there are good decent people who aren’t out to screw you for their own benefit. I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself after they go home next week. Right...enough of this kind of thing...that’s the first and last time I’m going to get all emotional on this blog...it needed to be said. Peace out:(