i was awakened my sayang with the news dat petrol price has been increased yet again to 30 sen a litre.

paklah, go fish urself and die.

all the while ive been blogging, ive been resonating my anger, frustration and probably a litle of my own menace into what i write . i cant help it, dats how i feel. sue me.

speaking of suing, i feel apprehensive, sometimes downright offensive with this group of professional we know as liars, eh, i mean lawyers, who  among other lives off the practice of suing and giving fender-bender legal advice to people.

currently, i am enthrusted into their world due to 2 things. no.1 is my pending court hearing that has been postponed 3 times, each time forcing my intestines to get wound up, all the way to klang. the case is about the accident that i was involved in 6 blardy years ago. even the guy who's suing me is dead to cancer. the case nevertheless, still on the docket. the chinkie's family wants money- surprise, surprise. the reason that the case has been appended so many times is that the damages claimed amounts to only 30k, so shaving off a third of that is not much. why bother with ikan bilis when u can get a toman to fry?

in the corporate scene, the lawyer handling the sales and purchase for bukit jalil houz also has a big fish mindset, coz since our houz would not bring much business, they dont bother to push the paper around much for approval and such. haiyo, ho mah fan coz azrul planning to get the surplus of the home loan to finance the wedding.

i am not saying that all lawyers are like this. probably there are a lot of good ones out there, and i sure hope that i would only haf to deal with that kind in the future or none at all. at least, no more mangkuks like jim's sis and marion anthony.

the avian flu has hit setapak. right where my sayang is staying. the nation has been told not to panic, but since when we have believe in whatever the authority has to say anyway? chances are they just wanna prevent people getting panic and running around like headless chicken (pun intended).

guess they have overestimated the people coz in camp wardieburn, the chickens are still 'here, there and everywhere'. check out the article in nstp. its funny how they can be so ignorant when the fact is in our case, the bloody disease PROPAGATED from EXACTLY where they are. they so dont give a damn til the extend they even have chicken roaming INSIDE their houses. gila.

an afterthought- hey, isnt it really weird to let chicken go into your houz like u do ur cats and dogs. i mean, even if they are ur pets, they tend to step on crap and shit and then bring it into ur houz. u haf to give it to their 4-legged counterparts to be smarter and more hygenic. cats can even groom themselves, so there.

i do not want to be racist, but *munkies (malay **chinkies) are like dat. they rarely give a damn, and when bad things happen, all they can say is "itu takdir tuhan, berserah saja lah". whadda fish?? u could prevent it form happening in the first place, and im pretty sure god doesnt want u to sit around and do nothing in the face of adversity. in fact, i really think that what they do (or DONT do) constitute to crime, coz they actually contribute to the epidemic that will eventually harm and kill people.

btw, i juz read the news saying dat another 2 has been admitted to HKL, suspected of having contracted the disease. the previous 4 out of 7 have been released coz they tested negative. but no comment (by the health ministry) has been made about the remaining 3. we are left to our imagination on whatever is actually happening to them, coz the day the government gonna admit that those people got bird flu is when someone dies of it. bit too late then, isnt it?

so sayang, that's it. no more kfc or masak ayam kak ina for us, k? (not that we can afford it at the time being anyway, so it's all good for us)

                                                   * munkies - malays

                                                    ** chinkies - chinese

helo, i dont see the point la. we need new regime, new strategy, new blood!

blakang, tgk muka sama ja. ada la sekor dua muka baru tapi yg hampeh je la. i mean, khairi? jadik family biznes ka? even dr.m STRONGLY DISCOURAGED his sons from invloving in such a blatant and outright manner in the nation's politics.

so, in the end, he pushed people here and there, somewhat like arranging the furnitures in you living room. pi mai pi mai tang tu. n sum who couldnt stomach the absurdity of it all, dropped thier pose,( tho they may say sumthin else to the press) hey, who r u kidding la?

one silver lining dat i am hoping for at least, is dat with  the departure of kadir sheikh fadir, our former bow-tied information minister, MITV will start sooner so we can all be rid of our blardy astro dat balrdy repeats everything.

otherwise,  we can't expect much from the pak tani-state-of-mind cabinet. i cant agree more when people say pak lah is digressing on important matters of the country. i mean, c'mon la, even pak ungku ardi told u to unpeg the riggit earlier, didnt he? but what are u focusing on now insted? blardy agriculture.

bosannya tada my own digicam, or at least phone with cam. juz realized dat i couldve taken photo on the freak accident yesterday n sent it 2 nst. with luck, i couldve gotten 200 bucks.

nway, altho not quite nst worthy, juz now ada satu benda jadi in front of my own blardy eyes dats even freakier, and made me think - dunia ni nak kiamat dah ke?

i was walking near guardian 15 when i heard a load kerfuffle- anjing2 menyalak so weirdly. pelik gak coz area tu mana ada anjing and why la bunyi semacam ja..

 then tgk2 4 male dogs with all thier things toinked up chasing and blardy humping one single bitch. i mean they were practically biting each others head of to get a go with dat one solitary and not so voluntary female dog. people around dat area actually stopped and stared at the sight, coz its so damn freaky. i mean, has anybody seen dat happening before, at such a near vicinity of traffic and human being? gila.

it was downright disturbing. almost the entire crowd sported a horror-stricken face  as they dispersed. even this group of chinese college guys. from the look of it, i think the thing must be a bad omen or sumthin to their superstition. come to think of it, ha ah la.. dis year kan the year of the dog...

whateva la. it doesnt mean nthin to me other than sumtimes, freaky stuffs happens. so no point being gelabah n sacred shitless. kunfayakun. if it is meant to happen, it juz bloody will.

aiyoh, juz got off the phone wif my mom. what is her problem. i mean it is unheard of dat the PARENTS of the marrying couple lak yang pegi pejabat agama nak daftar n book for a date. she's bloody gelabah-ing herself la. i feel so geram, i ask her to do as she likes. then, she call me sombong and hang up.

fuck la.

i have no mood nmore. she LLLLLOOOOOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSS

making me miserable like this.

(whether she realize it or not)

ni aphal lak minah sebelah ni dok pandang2 ja. haa.. ni yg buat angin satu badan ni. sound kang sia sia ja.

"hujan like cikala" dats wat mr.cheong sed. but, really. lately, asal kul 4 lebih ja dah mula gelap. after that the sky broke loose and hell poured forth. with winds that can make a hen lay the same egg a coupla bloody times.

in fact, a tree big as ass fell  on a lamp post and  then both fell on a passing car in front of the library. there was fire brigade, ambulance.. the whole work. scary. it was like demon howling masa tgh ribut tuh. then kilat tak habis2 berdentum2. kuat gila. i couldve had a heart arrest for everytime the lightning stikes. sumer lak menyambar so near to our building. macam tau2 ja byk setan kat dalam.. hehe..

so, dat means, since monday, i havent jogged at all for this week. in fact, i havent been jogging much on weekdays dah. esp. when my mom lately allergic gila about me jogging. tah hape tah she so worried about. doesnt she realize that what i do is hardly a workout pun. i mean, hari tu while i was going round the apartment block, a pakcik tua overtook me, and overjogged me. when i stopped at my third measly round, he was still goin on strong. god, i am so unfit, i hate myself.

one of my biggest dream now is to be able to jog at least 5km effortlessly. will i  ever achive it? ntah la. i guess the adage 'for one step foward u take, there's ten things holding you back' holds true.

guess who's gonna be my supervisor for final project?

 MISS SHANTY PONNUDORAY.

the other tormented soul to be facing her wrath is irene. no kidding, she cried right there in the eng.office. for real, tears and snot, no bars hold. poor kid, little did she care that shanty was right next door and couldve heard her bawling out not wanting her as a super.  

i guess, i am still quite relatively calm about it. i mean, its a drawn lot, and i am somehow just meant to get her. i've done the whole bismillah 44 kali and prayed for the best. i guess, incomprehensibly, this is the best for me. there must be a silver lining sumwhere behind this sumwhat tainted fate. maybe it will unravel due course, or otherwise, only god can explain.

it is as if the trials and tribulations are goin to be nothing but more challenging from now on. probably the climax has passed, but the aftermath is just as painful in the ass as everything else. i have the feeling this episode is just an interlude of bigger things to come.

but why sayang, have u been nothing but sweetness to me?

to date, you are facing a scrimp for cash,and u are overloaded with work. u just got back frm shuttling between pahang, kelantan and terengganu, but off u went to johor with nothing but the clothes on your back, for TWO DAYS right after. then there's your bosses and superiors who are more often than not a bunch of clowns trying to turn you into a black sheep. in fact the whole bloody maxis is a huge circus.

i really dont know what else to say than that i love you very much and i am grateful that you are right here with me despite all you are facing, through the hardest points and uncertainties in my life.

its a dog eat god world. i mean really. maybe it's to commemorate the chinese dog year dis year.

when it rains, it pours. juz when things r already fished up, we HAVE to be short of cash NOW.

It could be said that misery "...is not created nor destroyed, merely transformed". - The Law of Conservation of Misery

we shouldnt have gone to kl yesterday. if not, azrul could've avoided a fucked up blame-storming meeting and i could've avoided a fucked up accident.

im still too distraught to write more.

it's a fucked up monday.