It’s part and parcel of the job

The Star Online > Nation

Wednesday June 28, 2006

Tell children how much you earn, parents urged

JOHOR BARU: Parents should tell their children their salaries so that they can help their parents by not overspending, Deputy Domestic Trade and Consumer Affairs Minister Datuk S. Veerasingam said. 

He said children needed to know what their parents earned so that they could gauge the family spending power and know the monthly budget. 

“Many parents do not do this. So, their children tend to overspend their parents' money,” he said when launching Puspanita's Smart Spending Seminar here yesterday. 

Veerasingam said it was also crucial for people to start to save early and that working people should begin with at least 10% of their salaries to ensure that their future and that of their children were taken care of.  

On the recent sugar shortage, Veerasingam said it had helped consumers reduce their sugar intake. 

“We actually take a lot of sugar in a day. It is advisable to cut down on sugar,” he said. 

On another matter, Verasingam said that between Feb 28 and June 25, the ministry had conducted checks on 324,881 premises and found 541 operators flouting the law. 

Of these, 492 failed to display price on the items sold, 20 did not follow controlled item prices, and 29 displayed contradicting prices. 

The ministry also sealed RM256,089 worth of goods and issued compounds totalling RM59,950.  

The Star Online > Nation

Wednesday June 28, 2006

Teachers?happiness at stake

Comment: By K. PARKARAN

THOUSANDS of non-graduate teachers from primary schools are in the process of obtaining a degree after heeding the call by the Government to enhance themselves academically. 

But now, they are a worried lot after seeing that 325 of their seniors have been posted to secondary schools in other states far away from their homes. 

With thousands more signing up for the courses each year, the problem could reach acute proportions if the planners do not take stock of the situation. There are currently about 200,000 diploma holders in the service who can apply for the degree courses after five years of teaching. 

These teachers are part of the Education Ministry Program Khas Pengsiswazahan Guru (PKPG) ?a programme to help non-graduate teachers acquire a degree, as it only wants graduates in the teaching service by 2010. 

The affected teachers are mostly married and settled in the towns where they last taught and now, they are in a dilemma. 

We are not talking about new teachers here. These are people with more than 10 years in the service, who are married with children and whose spouses are from the private sector, making it difficult for them to get transfers to follow their partners. 

Before this, they had to struggle with half pay during the three years of study. 

Many of them have bought houses in towns where they had taught and are comfortably settled in. So to uproot them at this stage means taking them away from the family and disrupting their happiness, which can lead to hardship and problems. 

This is obviously going to add unnecessary stress to their lives. Among other things, it will cause them extra financial burden, take them away from performing their parental duties, make them travel every weekend to their homes and, in some cases, cause marital problems. 

The cumulative effect of all these will be felt in the quality of teaching, to say the least. Haven we all experienced this in the jobs we do, how family-related stress affects productivity at the workplace? 

For the ministry to cite national interest as the reason for their postings without considering family interest is tantamount to saying family comes second. But this is not what the administration under the caring Prime Minister Datuk Seri Abdullah Ahmad Badawi has been promoting. Under Islam Hadhari, a strong family institution is a cornerstone. 

Since taking over the helm in 2003, the Prime Minister has never failed to emphasise the need for Malaysians to strengthen the family institution as the basis for national development. His push for an excellent delivery system also involves the teaching and learning process. 

The 325 teachers who got their posting orders on June 1 are in dire straits owing to this decision. They have been given three options. 

They can take up their new posting in Johor and apply for a transfer back to the state where they were teaching before taking up their studies; inform the Education Ministry of any vacancy or retirement of English and Tamil teachers in their home state so that priority will be given to them to return; or, take no-pay leave for six months and apply for a transfer back to their state at the end of the year. 

As parents, they can perfectly understand the Government need to fill vacancies in other states while trimming the excess in some states. But that was not the deal ?at least that was the impression given ?when they started the PKPG courses. 

The ministry had said about five years ago that teachers would be posted to schools in their hometowns to keep them happy, for better productivity. 

So instead of forcing things down their throats, the ministry could perhaps consider a few options that could then be the basis for future postings of these teachers. Some of them are: 

感OST or transfer only those who are single to fill out-of-state vacancies as it will be easier for them to handle the situation; 

愁RY the persuasion method first and ask for volunteers; or, 

愛ETAIN them in the primary schools and place them in the graduate scale. This will help achieve the Government target of having only graduate teachers in all schools eventually. 

We simply cannot afford to have so many unhappy teachers in our system. 

Each unhappy and angry teacher will directly affect five to six family members. This will eventually multiply to thousands or even hundreds of thousands of unhappy people in our midst. 

This is definitely not good for the nation and the ruling party, as those affected might use the ballot box to show their anger. It best not to rock the boat under the prevailing political situation. 

Having good teachers alone is not enough. Having those with determination and who are full of commitment is equally vital. These teachers fit the bill, as obtaining a degree while being away from loved ones also shows strength of character. 

The Government has spent a lot of money on them and it best not to lose them to the private sector just because someone in the ministry lacked foresight. 

This too is part of the delivery system that Abdullah talks about with so much passion. This is a serious problem that needs immediate attention.  

BULLYING & VICTIMIZATION:  
PREVENTION & INTERVENTION

A Parent’s Guide

Psychology Department

Psychological Services of the Toronto Catholic District School Board is committed to using its professional knowledge and expertise in assisting parents and schools to ensure that the learning environment remains a safe and welcoming place for children to grow and develop their full potential within the context of our Catholic faith and Gospel values.

Psychology staff make use of their psychological knowledge base and clinical skills to support the Board policy of anti-violence in our schools.  Our commitment to whole school anti-bullying programmes is illustrative of this thrust.  Psychology staff are engaged in raising public awareness of this problem, providing ongoing workshop series and training to support schools in the implementation of anti-bullying programmes.  To supplement the Psychology Newsletter focusing on the theme of Bullying & Victimization, a binder containing guidelines and resources on anti-bullying programmes is available to all elementary TCDSB schools.  

This brochure and website represents an attempt to reach out to parents it invite all of you to be partners in our fight against injustice and suffering that can pervade the lives of our children if we allow bullying and victimization to go unchecked.

John Chan, Psychological Associate, East Curriculum Support Unit has played a key role in bringing information on the topic of bullying and victimization to the attention of a variety of stakeholders within the Toronto Catholic District School Board.  The contents of this brochure reflect in large part his work in this area. 

Fran Rauenbusch  
Chief Psychologist,
Toronto Catholic District School Board

Dr. Fran Rauenbusch,
Chief Psychologist,
TCDSB CATHOLIC EDUCATION CENTRE,
80 Sheppard Avenue East,
North York, Ontario M2N 6E8
Telephone: (416) 222-8282 ext. 2524
Fax: (416) 512-3428

Members of the interdisciplinary team of your school
are available to offer assistance to you and your children. |
Please make your request for assistance  
through the school principal.

BULLYING & VICTIMIZATION:

There is now a growing body of international data which consistently shows a rate of 7% of students reporting bullying other students and 9% of students reporting being victimized with some regularity in an average elementary school.  Some studies by Debra Pepler, Ziegler & Rosenstein-Manner conducted locally in inner city Toronto elementary schools had come up with similar, if not higher rates of the problem.

What is Bullying?

Different definitions of bullying agree on the following characteristics:

Bullying is:

A deliberate act to harm and intimidate

• Persistent over time

•   A systematic abuse of power in which the victim has difficulty defending himself/herself

• Characterized by unequal levels of affect between the victim and bully (i.e. the victim is typically very upset and in great distress while the bully is usually calm and in control, with a lack of compassion for the victim)  

Bullying should be distinguished between isolated aggressive acts, rough and tumble play and conflicts between two equals.  For example, it is not bullying when two children of roughly the same age, strength, or developmental level fight or quarrel.

Bullying can be:

PHYSICAL:   
e.g. pushing, kicking, hitting, defacing/ destroying property, threatening with a weapon

VERBAL:
e.g. name-calling, taunting, teasing, verbal threats, intimidating phone calls, extortion

SOCIO-EMOTIONAL:
e.g. malicious rumours, setting up to take blame, ostracization from group, the silent treatment, threatening to withdraw friendship

These behaviours can further take on racist and sexual dimensions e.g. racial taunts, graffiti, ethnic slurs and gestures; unwanted physical contact or abusive/dirty comments.

Consequences: 

For the Victim:

• Anxiety, fear, sadness and possible depression

• Lowered self-esteem

• Disrupted academic achievement

• Avoidance of school and absenteeism

• Psychosomatic symptoms (e.g. fatigue, stomachaches, migraines)

• Irrational reactions (e.g. panic, irrational retaliation, suicide)

These behaviours can result in a vicious cycle of escalating victimization: e.g. lowered self-esteem, ineffective avoidance strategies and fear reactions further reinforce the bully’s choice of a particular student as a prime target.  School becomes an inescapable nightmare for the victim, suffering in silent indignity and humiliation of his/her person.  They also tend to blame themselves for their plight, and in their misery are often convinced by the bully that they deserve it and that they invite the bullying upon themselves.

Being bullied is thus a very serious matter, and the available research data have pointed out clearly that:

• A lot of victimization goes unnoticed and unreported.

• Children being bullied need and deserve adult intervention and help.

• Bullying is not normal peer conflict and cannot be sorted out by the children themselves.

• Without intervention, the problem will not go away.  Immediate adult

• Intervention is the only effective way to stop it.  

For the Bully:

The bully learns that aggression on, and abuse of, another person pays.  The material rewards (e.g. taking possession of the victim’s leather jacket) and social rewards (e.g. being recognized as a gang leader) are powerful incentives to ensure the perpetuation of this pattern of behaviour.  And because adults seldom intervene and the victims feel it is useless to tell adults, the bully often gets away with the act and feels he is omnipotent.  Aggression will become his/her predominant mode of solving problems.  Bullying can therefore be viewed as a component of a more generally antisocial and rule-breaking, conduct-disorder behaviour pattern, predictive of maladjustment in later life, as confirmed in the following findings;  

Bullies have 4 times the average rate of ending up on a criminal register

They have more adjustment problems in the course of their lives: e.g. a much higher rate of using mental health services, more alcoholism, more driving offenses, more antisocial personality disorders

The failure to learn prosocial behaviour interferes with major spheres of their lives, They do not achieve socially, economically or professionally

There is more abusive behaviour in their spousal relationships

Although bullies tend to be equal to their normal peers in measured intelligence, their aggressive behaviour often gets in the way of developing intellectual skills.  By junior high school they usually get lower grades and develop a negative attitude to school.  Over time, their aggression is a marker for every negative outcome that there is in life.  They seldom achieve a high degree of success in school or careers.

The price that both the family and the society have to pay is great indeed:

Parents should therefore be very concerned about bullying because the bullies are not just harming others, they are also harming themselves.  There are dire consequences not only for the victims, but also for the bullies.

What Can Be Done?

The past decades of psychological research on this topic have clearly established that a whole-school anti-bullying approach is the most effective way of dealing with the problem.

This is most succinctly encapsulated in the statement the British Government made in its first Action Against Bullying Pack which was sent to every school in the U.K.:  

“The single most important thing a school can do to prevent bullying is to have a clear policy to which staff, pupils and parents are committed”

The TCDSB Policy Register on Violence Prevention sent out to all schools in March, 1995 included these clearly stated principles:

“TCDSB is committed to a safe and welcoming learning environment for out students and staff”.

“Students must receive a strong violence prevention message.  Those who would use violence to resolve their differences, to harm, to intimidate or to harass others must be certain that they will be dealt with firmly and with demonstrated consequences”.

Under this Policy, every TCDSB School is required to establish a Code of Behaviour, which amongst other things will:

“…state unequivocally that intimidation, physical, verbal or written, sexual or psychological abuse, or BULLYING shall not be tolerated”.

The policy itself is a statement intended to guide action and organization within TCDSB schools.  It assists them in establishing a clear set of agreed aims which provide pupils, staff and parents with a sense of direction and an understanding to do something about bullying behaviour.  Individual schools will then have to define strategies, procedures and systems for preventing and responding to bullying.  These have to be implemented at a system-wide level i.e. all parts of the school system have to be addressed in a concerted effort to change attitude and behaviour.  

Addressing Bullying at the School Level:

Bullying and victimization is a school problem not only because the school is the arena where the act is committed, but also because school attendance is mandatory and children cannot choose who they want to be with.  It is the right of children therefore, to be assured of their safety whilst under the charge of the school, and to expect that their learning and their lives are not disrupted by bullying.  The school needs the support of the whole community to achieve this goal.

The school might feel that acknowledging the existence of the problem will stigmatize itself in the eyes of parents, particularly if the other schools in the locality are not doing anything.  There still exists the myth that only bad schools have bullying.  Informed parents should therefore make it known to their schools that any preventive, proactive programme aimed at reducing violence and bullying has your full support and approval as a progressive school.  

When Bullying Occurs:

If you suspect that your child is being bullied, ask him/her directly.  Children who are being bullied are often frightened to tell adults what is happening and may deny at first that there is anything wrong.  Assure your child of your support and that it is not his/her fault.  Take what your child tells you seriously and find out exactly what has been going on.

If your child is actually being bullied, do not expect that the problem will go away by itself.  Do not promise to keep the bullying secret but reassure your child that you will help sort out the problem.  Take immediate action to inform the school authority.  Ask to see the class teacher and/or the Principal directly.  Expect that the matter is dealt with in a way that your child will receive full protection from retaliation by the bully.  The school may choose some proven, pragmatic methods to deal with the bully which might not initially appear to you as deserving punishment for the bully.  But if these methods result in favourable outcome for you child and improve the situation, it will be wise to support the school’s efforts.

Keep the school informed about the situation so that they know if their method of addressing the bullying has been successful.

When you learn that your child is being bullied, keep a log of incidents and make a note of all injuries with photographs and details of doctor/hospital visits.  A written and dated record makes it easier to check facts.  Keep a note of everyone you speak to about the bullying, and keep copies of any letters you write.

Some parents expressed concerns that if they told the school that their children were targets of bullying, their children’s report card in school or their chances of entering a reputable university or college would be jeopardized.  Not only is this not true, but also parents should trust that TCDSB schools will do all they can to resolve the situation.  If the student and parents do not come forward to make a formal complaint, there is no way that the school can know and intervene accordingly.

Each school has an interdisciplinary support team comprising Psychology, Social Work and other professional staff.  Their services to you and your child are accessed through the school principal.

Being bullied is a serious matter.  Many forms of bullying are criminal in nature (e.g. physical assault, stealing or destructions of personal properties, extortion).  As a parent, you may want to report the incidents to the police even if the bully is under- aged.  Ask the police to document the incident.

If all else fails, ask the principal for support in having your child transferred to another school.  The same child may thrive in a different school environment with a group of children having different values.

How Do I Know If My Child is A Victim of Bullying:

Out of shame and/or fear, a lot of times children do not tell adults that they are being bullied.  Adults working with children should be vigilant about the possible signs that they are being bullied at school.

For parents, these are tell-tale signs that a child may be victimized by bullying.

Children may:

• Be frightened to walk to or from school or be unwilling to go to school at all

• Ask adults to drive them to or from school or change their route to school

• Begin to do poorly in their school work

• Arrive home regularly with clothes torn and/or books or belongings missing

• Continually lose pocket money

• Become withdrawn, start stammering, stop eating, attempt suicide

• Cry themselves to sleep and/or have nightmares and call out, “leave me along”

• Have unexplained bruises, scratches, cuts

• Have unexplained psychosomatic complaint (e.g. feels ill in the morning frequent stomach pains, headaches, chronic fatigue.)

• Refuse to say what is wrong

• Give improbable excuses to explain of the above

• Not have a single good friend to share free time with, never bring classmates home, never get invited to parties.

Adapted from Kidscape:  Stop Bullying 

How Can I Bully-Proof My Child?

Research tells us some children are more prone to victimization because they are anxious, fearful and unassertive by disposition.  They are generally weaker physically and are more over protected at home.  Their demeanor signals to the bully that they will not retaliate or be able to defend themselves effectively when picked on.  But this should not be taken as the victims’ fault.  Not all children having this disposition will end up being bullied, because there may not be a bully around to make life miserable for them.

The problem lies with the bully himself/herself.  Children who bully others pick on people because they need a target-victim.  They will also try to find an excuse to justify their action that the victim is different and therefore deserves to be picked on (e.g. speaking with an accent, being overweight, having pimples).  Children with special needs are more vulnerable, because they may have specific problems such as poor coordination, speech or language difficulties.  Sometimes the bullying can be worse if the child’s special needs are not immediately apparent (e.g. hearing loss or cystic fibrosis).  School staff should be made aware that these children need extra help.  In some cases, preparing all the children by discussing issued generally may avoid problems. 

No one deserves to be bullied because they are different.  The Gospel values of TCDSB schools teach children to appreciate and value that each one of us is different, to demonstrate the respect due to all human persons, and to create school communities where a sense of belonging, of ownership and of caring for one another prevails.

It is important for children being bullied to know that it is not their fault, and to realize that the bullies are not omnipotent.  It is natural for victimized children to feel scared, completely helpless and quite alone.  They need to be told that the situation is not hopeless and that adults will intervene on their behalf, and they should not feel guilty or shameful.  They need to understand that by not telling anyone they are fueling the power of the bully and reinforcing his/her aggressive acts.

I t may be encouraging for victims to know that it is possible to succeed in life in spite of being bullied at school.  Many well-known people were bullied when they were young.  Kidscape 6 gave a list of some of them:  Phil Collins (singer), Harrison Ford (actor), Mel Gibson (actor), Daryl Hannah (actress), Tom Cruise (actor), Michelle Pfeiffer (actress), Dudley Moore (actor), Neil Kinnock (politician), Frank Bruno (boxer), Janice Long (DJ), Amanda Ross (TV presenter), Duncan Goodhew (Olympic swimmer), Michael Grade (Head of Channel 4 TV in the U.K.), Sir John Harvey Jones (industrialist & TV presenter), Ranulph Fiennes (Polar explorer).  No doubt the list can go on.

There is a lot that parents can do to bulwark your child against being selected as a target of bullying.

Consider the following tips:

Being a social isolate highly increases the probability of being bullied.  Having even one friend on the playground is one of the most powerful protectives, especially for boys.  Increasing the social opportunities of your kids is the most useful prevention.  Invite other children, and groups of children, over to the house.  Encourage sleepovers.  Widen your child’s social circle by encouraging him/her to participate in group and community activities (e.g. the Scouts/Guides, volunteering at the Food Bank).

A bully preys on children who signal fearfulness and submissiveness.  Teach assertiveness, which is different from being aggressive.  Raise your child’s self-confidence.  Enroll him/her in classes and groups that develop competencies in activities that are valued by peers (e.g. music, art work, computer skills).  Help your child develop interests in areas which enable him/her to feel good about himself/herself.

Do not teach your child to fight back.  Fighting back is the worst defense.  In many instances the victimized children are actually physically smaller and weaker than the bully and fighting back can result in real physical harm.  Besides, not all bullying takes the form of physical aggression.  Counter-aggression to any form of bullying actually increases the likelihood of continued aggression.  This also answers a question often raised by parents, which is whether martial arts training is useful.  The foregoing argument applies here, that it is not advisable to teach your child to fight back at a bully.  On the other hand, martial arts training in its essence serves to bring out other valuable qualities other than brute force or vengeance.  They teach self-restraint, self-discipline and confidence in your own physical potentials-all are important signals to the bully that you are not an easy prey.

Discuss possible bullying scenarios with your child and how best to handle those situations.  In encountering a bullying incident, it is natural for children to feel panicky and therefore play into the hands of the bully.  Responding appropriately (e.g. staying calm, using strategies like humour or verbal comeback to defuse the situation, or telling the bully assertively to leave one alone) signals to the bully that you are not an easy target, and decreases the chance of being further victimized.  There are programmes at the school level to teach children such strategies.  The Anti-Bullying Binder prepared by the Psychology Department is available at your child’s school, and contains ideas you might find useful.

It is important to know what goes on in the school day for your child.  Make it a routine to ask about his/her day in school; ask what upsets them, not only what they are happy about.                   

It is important to know what goes on in the school day for your child.  Make it a routine to ask about his/her day in school; ask what upsets them, not only what they are happy about.

Establish parent networks and support groups.  Talk to other parents; where there is one victimized child there are likely to be others.  The Catholic School Advisory Council can be a focal point for information and creative problem-solving, as well as being a resource to the school in its efforts to provide a violence-free environment for children to learn in.  

What To Do If My Child Bullies Others?

There are many reasons why a child may become a bully.  Some children may turn to bullying as a way of coping with a difficult situation:  death of a loved one, their parents’ divorce.  Some are just spoilt rotten and bully to get his/her own way.  Some may be victims of abuse and act out their frustrations and anger on others.  Some want power, control and prestige and are prepared to use aggression and violence to command compliance and allegiance.  Some do it for material benefits.  Others copy what another person they admire does (e.g. a TV character portraying aggression).  A lot of times, children who bully others have a distorted view of the world and misperceive how others treat him or her.

Whatever the cause, bullies pick on others as a way of making life better for themselves.

In many cases, boys are the perpetrators of direct, physical bullying on other boys and girls.  They are frequently bigger and stronger than their victims and they use intimidation to get what they want.  They are often not happy and use bullying as a means of trying to achieve popularity and make friends.

Watch out for the following tell-tale signs that your child may be a bully:

Children who bully others usually:

• Are found to be physically stronger, and are effective in play activities, sports and fights (applies particularly to boys)

• Have strong needs to dominate and subdue others

• Brag about their actual or imagined superiority over other students

• Have temperamental inclinations (e.g. being hot-tempered, easily angered and impulsive)

• Have low frustration tolerance (e.g. have difficulties conforming to rules and tolerating adversities and delays, and may try to gain advantage by cheating)

• Are generally oppositional, defiant, and aggressive towards adults

• Are seen as being tough, hardened and show little empathy for other students

• Engage at a relatively early age (as compared with their peers) in other antisocial behaviour including stealing, vandalism, getting drunk, and associate with bad companions

• Pick on or attack others, targeting in particular those who are weaker and not able to defend themselves  

Adapted from D. Olweus (1993)  

Helping The Bullying Child:

For a fact, parents of students who are bullied and, in particular, who bully others, are relatively unaware of the problem and talk with their children about it only to a limited extent.  It is therefore often a shock to learn from the school that your child is bullying others.  The initial reactions are typically disbelief, denial and defensiveness.  Very often too, the bullying student will try to lay the blame squarely on the victim, and the latter in some instances might have acted irrationally (e.g. fighting back) to complicate the matter further.  It is important to maintain objectivity, to examine the evidence carefully and to assist the school in its effort to put an end to bullying.  Bullies have to learn that bullying is unacceptable and that if they continue to behave unacceptably, there are consequences.  Although they should be given plenty of encouragement and help to change, bullies must not be allowed to get away with tormenting others.  They are hurting both themselves and others.

Consider the following tips:

• Try to stay calm and not be defensive.  Find out what has been going on, why your child has been bullying and what can be done about it.

• Talk to your child.  Give assurances that you still love him/her.  Do not accept excuses, but make it clear that the bulling behaviour is not acceptable.  Find out from your child if there is anything in particular which is troubling him/her.  Seen if he/she has any ideas about why he/she bullies and how it could be stopped.

• Talk to the school staff.  Ask what ideas they have to help.  It might be helpful for you and your child to talk to the school psychology or social work staff.  Ask the school to arrange this.  In some serious cases, both the bully and the family might benefit from psychotherapeutic support.

• Encourage your child to take ownership of the problem and change his/her old ways.  Work out with your child ways of making amends for the bullying.

• Always intervene when your child is aggressive.  Any time adults do not intervene they are essentially reinforcing problem-solving through aggression.  Research has shown that non-contingent parenting methods foster noncompliance, and the inconsistent use of ineffective punishment has the effects of intermittently rewarding defiance.

• Set limits.  Help your child work out and practise alternative ways of behaving.  Parents can help by controlling their own aggression (e.g. using corporal punishment) and by  making it clear that violence is never acceptable.

• Model good relationships at home.  Help siblings get along.  Teach might is not right (e.g. being older, bigger does not necessarily confer unfair advantages).

• Train children to empathize with the distress and suffering of others.

• Create opportunities for your child to develop his/her talents.  Praise him/her when they do things well.  Set up a system of reward for good behaviour.

• Help your child design a balanced time-table of educational and recreational activities after school.  Make sure that children in groups have something worthwhile to do.  Bullying sometimes flourishes in boredom, and when children are together and have nothing to do.

• Do not use the TV as a baby-sitter and be highly selective about which programmes your children watch.  TV programmes, videos and video games which have a high violence content subvert your child’s values, dulls his/her sensitivity to victim suffering, wears down his/her resistance to violence and legitimizes violence as the accepted means of solving conflicts and frustration.

• If you are very concerned about the adverse effects of TV violence on your children, join local parental groups to lobby advertisers to withdraw their endorsement of such programmes.  

Bystanders:

Congratulations, if your child is neither a bully or a victim.  He/she is amongst the 85% of students in the school who constitute the silent majority amidst the bullying act.  Most school bullying occurs in full public view.  Your child would probably have occasions of seeing it, or at least know or heard about it from others.  The bully obtains a large part of his/her rewards socially (e.g. prestige or recognition that he/she is “top dog”).  The bully also needs a reaction from the audience, which may be entertainment, arousal, alarm or fear.  The social contagion that takes place also draws some audience into becoming part of the action.  The response of the bystanders therefore feeds into the social chemistry of the bullying act, whether the individual is aware of, or likes it.

Children who witness bullying are known to experience distress and anxiety reactions (e.g. nightmares, fear of going to school), although they themselves have not been directly involved or victimized.  They feel for the victims and are also fearful for their own safety, knowing all too well that the winds of bullying can change and they could be the target next.

For the most part, they keep their knowledge, fears and anxieties to themselves without telling adults.  They are also influenced by the hidden values in the student subculture which regards informing on peers as "snitching", " tattle-telling", or being a "rat", thereby conferring a false sense of invincibility and omnipotence on the bully.

The 85% silent majority can have a dramatic impact, if together they take a common stand on injustice.

You have an important role to play in combating bullying and victimization by teaching your child to:

• Express disapproval of the bullying act, and not be part of the crowd cheering on.

• Come to the aid of the victim.  Within safety considerations intervene and take concrete actions to stop the bullying (e.g. shouting out that a teacher is coming, running to the office to get adult help).

• Make extra efforts to include everyone in activities, especially those who are in need of a friend.  Befriend those who are socially isolated, particularly in the playground.

• Be a Good Samaritan; that safety in numbers and being your brother/sister’s keeper makes good survival sense.

• Distinguish between tattle-telling and standing up for what is just; that the myth of tattle-telling is invented by bullies to save their own skin.  Spread the word that bullying is bad for the bullies.

• Speak out and inform teachers of bullying incidents even if the victim is too scared to tell.  This will defuse the power base of the bully which thrives on intimidating  others into silence.

Tom Donovan, Director of Education
Joseph Carnevale, Chair of the Board

TRUSTEES 2002-2003

Mark Stefanini  
Rose Andrachuk  
Joseph Carnevale, Chair
Stefania Giannetta
Joshua Colle
Christine Nunziata
Michael Del Grande
Mary Ann Robillard, Honorary Treasurer
Catherine LeBlanc-Miller
Barbara Poplawski
Angela Kennedy
Paul John Crawford, Vice-Chair
Milo Silva, Student Trustee

As Confucius said that good education began at home. The ministry should have the couselling course for the parents but not the kids. Don't blindly follow the others but look at the real situation, plus culture in our region.

What is the programme looks like?

http://www.clemson.edu/olweus/evidence.html

The Star Online > Nation

Thursday June 29, 2006

A three-pronged plan designed to reduce opportunities for bullying

By KAREN CHAPMAN

PETALING JAYA: If the Education Ministry gives the go-ahead, schools can soon adopt a bullying intervention programme. 

Malaysian Psychological Association council member Datin Dr Noran Fauziah Yaakub said the group had been working on a programme designed to address bullying in primary and secondary schools. 

Dr Noran Fauziah: t won totally curb bullying?/div>

he plan is to carry out a pilot project in three schools with another three schools as a control.? 

If the programme proved successful in reducing bullying incidents, she added, it could hopefully be introduced nationwide with the ministry support.When contacted, the ministry parliamentary secretary P. Komala Devi confirmed that the proposal had been received. 

Komala, who chairs the sub-committee on psychology and health under the ministry steering committee on bullying, said the sub-committee had received several other proposals. 

e are studying the various proposals to ensure we implement the best possible programme,?she said. 

Dr Noran Fauziah said the association had worked with HELP University College Centre for Psychology to develop the intervention programme. 

According to her, the framework for the programme is based on the Olweus Bullying Intervention Programme, developed at Bergen University in Norway. 

The Olweus programme came about after three adolescent boys in northern Norway committed suicide in 1983, believed to because of severe bullying by peers.  

Norway Education Ministry then commissioned Prof Dan Olweus to conduct a large-scale research and intervention project on bully/victim problems. 

It was used in Norway from 1983 to 1985 among 2,500 children, which resulted in a significant reduction ?up to 50% ?in levels of bullying and being bullied. 

t won totally curb bullying but we can try to reduce the incidence,?Dr Noran Fauziah said. 

e are not saying our education system can handle bullying.  

t just that we feel that for bullying to be successfully nipped in the bud, we need to put into place a three-pronged programme targeting the school, classroom and individual.? 

Such an approach, she added, would not cost much as existing school staff were responsible for implementing the programme. 

She said that before introducing the programme, a team would distribute questionnaires among students to assess the nature and prevalence of bullying in a school. 

Once this is done, a bullying prevention coordinating committee will be set up, the school will adopt rules against bullying and the parent-teacher association will be roped in. 

Dr Noran Fauziah said simple brochures on basic information like identifying signs of bullying and reporting such incidents would be distributed to students. 

his will reinforce the point that there is support for the victims,?she added.