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Entries in "New Muslim Read Here !"
1
Why do we need a Religion?
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Published: Feb.07.2007 @ 8:16 am

Why do we need a Religion?


The question is "Why do we need a religion?" I am not going to answer this particular question directly.


In fact, I view the "religion" itself as being offensive. It is a misrepresentation of the word "deen", which means a complete, structured, divinely ordained way of life.


Therefore I say "Why are we in need of a correct way of life?"


Some May Ask, Why Talk About This?

But Look Around You, How many in Fact do understand there religion?..

How many praticy in Love toward's Allah The Al Mighty?

Our Problem Today is Lack.weakness and a very low Caracter..No Iman and Only eye's for all what's actually are forbidding to us.

Did Allah The Al Migthy Ever Tell You; That Your Life Should Be with An Among of Gold,Money and material Thing's?

Did Allah The Al Mighty Ever Tell You; That Thing's Around You, Should Be A Goal to Archieve?

Did Allah The Al Mighty Ever Tell You; That Even He Forbid, You would Be Allowed To Try Them?

No...Allah The Al Migthy Never Told You That !

Its Very Clear, That The Most Importent Word's Allah The Al Mighty Sent Toward's Human's Are Forgotten!

The essence of faith is to worship Allah – Allah says, "And I (Allâh) created not the jinns and humans except they should worship Me (Alone)."  51:56

If one worships God sincerely, He will provide him with the best things.

Hazrat Zahra (A.S)We have been placed on this earth for a special purpose, and one day we will be questioned regarding the fulfillment of that purpose, and whether we have fulfilled our obligations to God, society and to ourselvesReligion must address essential humanistic needs - physical needs, societal needs, emotional needs and psychological needs.

My mission today is to show you what Islam puts forward in relation to these needs.

It is not my purpose to "win you over to Islam." We hold firmly that your entering Islam will not benefit Allah in all His Glory in any way, and His Glory will not be diminished by your rejection of Islam. My mission is simply to get you acquainted with what one-fifth of the world’s population espouse as being the Ultimate Truth. It is to clarify your doubts, address your stereotypical assumptions and to call you to the realization that Allah calls you to worship Him Alone


Physical need

Turning first to physical needs - it is essential that a person’s physical needs be met, regardless of the individual’s place or situation.
Examples of physical needs include food, the quenching of one’s physical thirst, the displacement of one’s sexual drive, the need for freedom, security and peace.

Islam touches upon all of those essential aspects of our physical life – what we eat, how we eat, why we eat, with whom we share our food, etc. It is a complete way of life.

The Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) gave the example of an individual who is in the middle of the desert, and his camel runs away, taking with it all his provisions.

He will raise his hands in supplication and will say, "O Allah, feed me", but his food that he had was from haram or unlawful sources, and his clothing was from haram or unlawful sources.

The Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) asked, how can this man expect that Allah will accept his supplication and prayers?

This shows the importance in Islam of fulfilling our physical needs in the correct manner.

As Muslims we do not simply seek out sustenance and nourishment. Rather we seek out lawful means to earn the wealth with which we purchase our foods.

A true Muslim would prefer to forgo special foods purchase from illicit sources and eat in its place bread and water.

In Islam, the difference between halal (lawful things) and haram (unlawful things) is the articulation of a word and the righteous intention that accompanies it.


A good example is marriage. The difference between halal and haram personal relations between a man and a woman is that the bride and the groom saying "I accept" – that utterance governs the entire future of those two people.


In Islam, marriage is essential, and having relations outside of marriage is haram – it is a social vice that is deemed worthy of punishment.


Therefore we see that the discharge of ones’ physical needs – food, water, and lusts – are governed by the Laws of Allah.


As such, we begin to now see that Islam means to submit to Allah to attain peace with Allah.


The scholars of Islam have stated that the essence of Islam is captured in the Qur’an.


The essence of the Qur’an in turn is encompassed in the opening chapter of the Qur’an wherein Allah states


With the Name of Allâh, the Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.


All the praises and thanks be to Allâh, the Lord of the 'Alamîn (all that exists).


The Most Beneficent, the Most Merciful.


The Only Owner (and the Only Ruling Judge) of the Day of Recompense (i.e. the Day of Resurrection).


You (Alone) we worship, and You (Alone) we ask for help (for each and everything).


Guide us to the Straight Way


The Way of those on whom You have bestowed Your Grace, not (the way) of those who earned Your Anger, nor of those who went astray


And the essence of the opening chapter of the Qur’an is contained in one verse of the opening chapter: Iyyaaka na’budu wa iyyaaka nasta’een – You (Alone) we worship, and You (Alone) we ask for help (for each and everything).


Thus, the essence of Islam to is to submit only to Allah.

It is also important to note that Islam contains a martial law that dictate the mannerisms of warfare –

laws that are so strict that if a Muslim breaks them against a non-Muslim, the non-Muslim is viewed as being oppressed, and the Muslim is the oppressor.


In Islam we hold firmly that if in such a situation the Muslim would be deemed a sinner and at risk of being worthy of Allah’s Wrath and punishment.


As human beings we understand the necessity of a person’s way of life being fluid – inflexible in some circumstances, but malleable in others.


Muslims come from many, many different nationalities – but they all believe in the same thing, perform the same acts and submit in unison to Allah.


Islam is fluid, and accessible to all nationalities.


The Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) informed that he came to teach both the light and the dark in complexion.


And the Qur’an states that:

Omankind! We have created you from a male and a female, and made you into nations and tribes, that you may know one another. Verily, the most honourable of you with Allâh is that (believer) who has At-Taqwa (piety). Verily, Allâh is All-Knowing, All-Aware." Al-Hujurat (49:13)

Social needs


In Islam, it is an individual’s responsibility to his Creator that he lives among the people according to Islam.


Therefore, for example, an employee should be diligent, punctual and perform his duties correctly – not because he is afraid that he will be fired or he may suffer a pay cut, but only because he fears Allah.


He or she knows that Allah is judging them in how well they fulfill their duties and the obligations that they have been delegated.


Similarly, the family situation is based on love, trust, caring and openness, not because a person is a mother or father, but because their Creator directs them to treat their family members with love, respect and justness.


Environmental laws


Islam also dictates that we share what Allah has given us on this earth. Islam contains more specific laws relating to the physical environment than any other faith.


For example, the Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) said: "A woman has been brought to the door of Hell because she was cruel to a cat."

His companions asked, "How could this be?" He replied, "She confined the cat to a cage so it could not go out and find food, and she did not feed it herself."


The Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) also said, "A man has been granted admission to Paradise because he gave water to a thirsty dog."


Once the Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) saw a camel with tears in its eyes.


The Prophet consoled the camel, and noticed that it had an excessive load of burden on its back, which was causing it to be distressed.


The Prophet ((sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) admonished the person who had done this to the camel.


The Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) would often give his lessons under the shade of a tree. He informed his that the tree can hear him and benefits from his nearness.


The Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) said, "If an individual has an opportunity to plant a tree, even if he knows the Day of Judgment is imminent, let him plant the tree."


The Prophet ((sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) taught us that we would be rewarded for planting a tree even if the fruits of the tree were stolen – because planting the tree itself is an act that is sanctioned by Allah.


We are Allah’s vicegerents on the earth; it has been given us in trust. Just as we are not the lords of nature and the world, so the world is not our property which we can dispose of as we wish or as we are able.


Allah created nature and it belongs to Allah.


Everything in nature is a sign of Allah’s existence; that is, a token or missive.


The Qur’an expresses this truth as follows.


"We shall show them our signs in the [furthest] regions [of the earth], and in their own souls." Fussilat 41:53


"Behold! In the creation of the heavens and the earth; in the alternation of the night and the day; in the sailing of the ships through the ocean for the profit of mankind; in the rain which God sends down from the skies, and the life which He gives therewith to an earth that is dead; in the beasts of all kinds that He scatters through the earth; in the change of the winds, and the clouds subjugated between the sky and earth — [here] indeed are signs for a people who think." Al-Baqarah 2:16.

Emotional needs and the Importance of family relationships

Islam also teaches us the importance of the family relationship.


The relationship in the home is a relationship that builds communities.


The first people that the Prophets would tell of their Divine Message were their own family members – for example, after seeing the burning bush, Moses first went home and told his immediate family of what he had seen; when Noah heard that the flood was about to come, he first went and told his family.


The same was true of the Prophet Mohammad (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) – the first people that he told about his message were his wife, his best friend, his cousin and his adopted son.


The Muslims must follow this example.


When Muslims give anything – whether it be knowledge or material things – they must begin first with their immediate families, and spread from there to their friends, neighbours and extended families.


Rules for living in society


Islam seeks to stamp out all vices. So intoxication is forbidden in all its forms – alcohol, drugs, cigarettes etc – because intoxication leads to decay in society.


Extra-marital activities are also forbidden for a similar reason. The taking of a human life without due cause is forbidden.


The Qur’an states – as does the Torah – that the one who gives life to an individual – that is, saves a human life – it is as if he has brought life to all of humanity; and the one who kills an individual, it is as if he has brought death to all of humanity.


But the Qur’an also states – as does the Torah – an eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.


The one who begins the aggression is the oppressor.


Islam has a shari’ah – a set of laws or rules which Muslims must follow. In Islam, one cannot say that man-made laws could ever be better than laws ordained by Allah.


The Qur’an states: "Should not He Who has created know (what is best for His Creation)?


And He is the Most Kind and Courteous (to His slaves) All-Aware (of everything)." Al-Mulk 67:14


Why Islam?


Why do we have to follow a shari’ah or divine law?


Why this way of life?


What is so valuable about this way of life that would cause people to leave the path they have known their whole life and join Islam?


The answer is simple. It is not always a person’s own choice, but a guidance from Allah.


The Qur’an says that the example of one who receives guidance is as of one who has life.


And the example of one who does not receive guidance is as one who is dead.


Success is not tangible or measurable – one can never be rich enough, or pretty enough, or ever have enough things.


As the Prophet (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) said, "If a man was given a valley of gold, he would search for another one."


But in Islam, the individual recognises that no matter how high he is, he can never be free of need.


No matter how high he is, it can be taken from him instantly – especially if his status and position is ill-gotten.


Also – and perhaps more importantly – the individual realises that no matter how depressed he is, there is always Allah watching over him, and it could always be worse.


The individual knows that there is something more than the 60 or 70 years on this earth, and that there will come a day when he will be asked about how he fulfilled his obligations.

There are three essential elements to belief in Allah:


1) Belief that there is a Creator and a Rabb - Lord.


2) Belief that the Creator is singular and the only one deserving of worship since He Alone is the sole Creator. As well if there was more than one, they would compete with each other. Allah is the only One solely worthy of worship.


3) Belief in the attributes of the Creator – this entails learning about who Allah is and how He describes Himself to us through study of the scriptures so as to recognize Him and maintain our duties to Him.

I challenge you to pick up any copy of the Qur’an and read it, see why it attracts so many.

Feel its resonance in your heart.


This is not different from the method of those at the time of the Prophet Mohammad (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him): a group of people would walk past and hear the recitation of a passage from the Qur’an, and it would bring tears to their eyes.


The method is the same as that which worked to bring people to the truth at the time of Jesus (alihi as Salaam- Peace be upon him) – he would say to people "Follow me", and they would follow him, because they would hear the truth in what he said.


Think of the power of the testimony of Faith that Muslims constantly affirm in word, inner belief and outward action. The Shaahaada –


Testimony of Faith is simple yet complex.


In it we show our complete belief in the fact that Allah – we bear witness that He is the only one worth worship.


You cannot bear witness to something unless you have seen it.


None of us have seen God, or the Prophet Mohammad (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him), but we bear witness based on the certainty of our faith that there is a God, and Mohammad (sala Allahu ‘Alihi wa Salaam - Peace be upon him) is His Messenger.


We pray five times a day – not when we want to, but at prescribed times throughout the day.


We fast – even from the things that are lawful, such as water and food – simply to show God that we are willing to sacrifice anything to please Him.

We give charity – 2.5% of the money saved from throughout the year – to aid those in need.

We perform pilgrimage – the pilgrimage that changes lives. Malcolm X hated the concept of integration of races. For him, "the white man was the devil".


This was a product of the intense oppression suffered by racial minorities in many countries, especially in the USA. Allah blessed this man who was full of hatred with pilgrimage.

Malcolm X wrote a letter from Hajj to his wife, Betty:

"Never have I witnessed such sincere hospitality and overwhelming spirit of true brotherhood as is practiced by people of all colours and races here in this ancient Holy Land, the home of Abraham, Muhammad and all the other Prophets of the Holy Scriptures. For the past week, I have been utterly speechless and spellbound by the graciousness I see displayed all around me by people of all colors.

"I have been blessed to visit the Holy City of Mecca, I have made my seven circuits around the Ka'ba, led by a young Mutawaf named Muhammad, I drank water from the well of the Zam Zam. I ran seven times back and forth between the hills of Mt. Al-Safa and Al Marwah. I have prayed in the ancient city of Mina, and I have prayed on Mt. Arafat."

"There were tens of thousands of pilgrims, from all over the world. They were of all colors, from blue-eyed blondes to black-skinned Africans. But we were all participating in the same ritual, displaying a spirit of unity and brotherhood that my experiences in America had led me to believe never could exist between the white and non-white."

"America needs to understand Islam, because this is the one religion that erases from its society the race problem. Throughout my travels in the Muslim world, I have met, talked to, and even eaten with people who in America would have been considered white - but the white attitude was removed from their minds by the religion of Islam. I have never before seen sincere and true brotherhood practiced by all colours together, irrespective of their colour."

"You may be shocked by these words coming from me. But on this pilgrimage, what I have seen, and experienced, has forced me to rearrange much of my thought-patterns previously held, and to toss aside some of my previous conclusions. This was not too difficult for me. Despite my firm convictions, I have always been a man who tries to face facts, and to accept the reality of life as new experience and new knowledge unfolds it. I have always kept an open mind, which is necessary to the flexibility that must go hand in hand with every form of intelligent search for truth."

"During the past eleven days here in the Muslim world, I have eaten from the same plate, drunk from the same glass, and slept on the same rug - while praying to the same God - with fellow Muslims, whose eyes were the bluest of blue, whose hair was the blondest of blond, and whose skin was the whitest of white. And in the words and in the deeds of the white Muslims, I felt the same sincerity that I felt among the black African Muslims of Nigeria, Sudan and Ghana."

"We were truly all the same (brothers) - because their belief in one God had removed the white from their minds, the white from their behaviour, and the white from their attitude."

"I could see from this, that perhaps if white Americans could accept the Oneness of God, then perhaps, too, they could accept in reality the Oneness of Man - and cease to measure, and hinder, and harm others in terms of their 'differences' in colour."

"With racism plaguing America like an incurable cancer, the so-called 'Christian' white American heart should be more receptive to a proven solution to such a destructive problem. Perhaps it could be in time to save America from imminent disaster - the same destruction brought upon Germany by racism that eventually destroyed the Germans themselves.

"Each hour here in the Holy Land enables me to have greater spiritual insights into what is happening in America between black and white. The American Negro never can be blamed for his racial animosities - he is only reacting to four hundred years of the conscious racism of the American whites. But as racism leads America up the suicide path, I do believe, from the experiences that I have had with them, that the whites of the younger generation, in the colleges and universities, will see the handwriting on the walls and many of them will turn to the spiritual path of truth - the only way left to America to ward off the disaster that racism inevitably must lead to."

"Never have I been so highly honoured. Never have I been made to feel more humble and unworthy. Who would believe the blessings that have been heaped upon an American Negro? A few nights ago, a man who would be called in America a white man, a United Nations diplomat, an ambassador, a companion of kings, gave me his hotel suite, his bed. Never would I have even thought of dreaming that I would ever be a recipient of such honours - honours that in America would be bestowed upon a King - not a Negro

"All praise is due to Allah, the Lord of all the Worlds.

Sincerely,

Al-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz (Malcolm X)

Such is the power of the pilgrimage. People from all countries come to Makkah wearing only two pieces of white cloth, all saying "Labbayk Allahumma labbayk" – "At your service, O Allah, at your service".

The essence of faith is to worship Allah – Allah says, "And I (Allâh) created not the jinns and humans except they should worship Me (Alone)." Adh-Dhariyaat 51:56

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BEING A NEW MUSLIM IN A FAMILY OF NON-MUSLIMS
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Published: Jan.09.2007 @ 9:39 am | Last edited: Jan.09.2007 @ 3:43 am
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BEING A NEW MUSLIM IN A FAMILY OF NON-MUSLIMS



First of all, if you are in the position of being a new muslim in a family of non-muslims, then many congratulations to you, and alhumdalillah that you have been guided to the right path. May Allah(swt) reward you for your efforts in getting this far, and may Allah (swt) shower many blessings on you. May you be guided through this transition in your life and may your faith grow stronger and stronger with each day. May you become an excellent muslim and through your example may others be inspired, and may your family find a contentment in your decision through your new found happiness in your life, inshaAllah.

TELLING YOUR FAMILY YOU HAVE CONVERTED

For some muslim converts telling their family of their decision is no problem at all. Some families of converts are very happy at the choice to become a muslim, and it is welcomed. Unfortunately though for other converts this is a difficult process, with various obstacles to face.

This page is designed to help new converts through this experience, or perhaps even 'old' converts who have kept their new religion hidden for some time. There is no magical answer as all families are different and will inevitably react in various ways. However, if we cannot provide exact answers, we can certainly go a long way to helping converts feel more comfortable in this situation, and by sharing with each other we will all grow stronger and more able to face problems inshaAllah.

Before we get into the possible family problems and the suggested solutions we should first emphasize that although some converts have some problems, there are many others who do not. This page is designed to help those who are met with obstacles, so may, unavoidably, come across as negative. So please remember that some families of converts are very happy that their relative has converted. Some reasons for the happy reactions are as follows:

    * they are happy that the relative concerned has found God.
    * they are happy that the relative concerned will be leading a moral life, especially in this day and age.
    * the family have seen the happiness that the relative concerned has found and this in turn makes them happy.
    * they are pleased that the relative concerned now has discipline and stability in their life.
    * families knowledgable about Islam, although they may not convert themselves, realise the truth about Islam (as opposed to the propaganda).

Please remember that the anticipation of telling your family about your new religion is often worse than the reality. We find that we re-run the moment over and over in our minds, imagining the worst possible outcome. Then, when we come to actually having the discussion, things go much better than expected.
So, if your worries are more self created, rather than based on 'real problems' them the advice would be to just get it over and done with. I totally understand that this is easier said than done, but having spent a long time pondering the event myself, I know that I would have been better just getting on with it. The bottom line is that it is a conversation that you will have to have with your family, or at least your parents, one day, so why not get the ball rolling now and start to deal with any issues that arise.

For those who have bigger concerns with telling their families, we have tried to identify the common concerns, and where we can offer some help. This may also be useful to those who did go ahead and tell their family, but are now experiencing problems. Please do not look at the possible problems below and get yourselves worried, we have not identified a possible problem without suggesting a possible solution.

It is very unlikely that you would face more than one or two of these problems, if any at all, and anyway it is better to be prepared just in case.

Possible Concerns to Deal With

There are many ways of overcoming all these concerns.


Let us start by reminding ourselves what the Quran says (2.286):

Allah (swt) does not impose upon any soul a duty but to the extent of it's ability; for it is (the benefit of) what it has earned, and upon it (the evil of) what it has wrought: Our Lord! do not punish us if we forget or make a mistake; Our Lord! do not lay on us a burden as Thou didst lay on those before us; Our Lord! do not impose upon us that which we have not the strength to bear; and pardon us and grant us protection and have mercy on us, Thou art our Patron, so help us against the unbelieving people.

If we keep this in mind we will be fine.

Alhumdalillah, as converts, Allah (swt) immediately allows us this opportunity to spread Islam within our family and inshaAllah earn some good deeds.

Your family are religious, practising another faith. How will they react when they hear you have chosen a different path for yourself?http://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution1.html#solution1

Your family are not at all religious and cannot understand why you would want to become religious.http://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution2.html#solution2

Your family have been taken in by the negative propaganda and as a result they perceive Islam to be violent. Reactions such as 'You are associating with terrorists'. http://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution3.html#solution3

Your family may have the wrong ideas about how Islam treats women.http://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution4.html#solution4

Your family think that religion causes war (of course it is people that do this!)http://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution5.html#solution5

Your family suggest that you just take the best bits out of all the religions. http://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution6.html#solution6

Your family are concerned about 'what will other people think?http://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution7.html#solution7

Your parents in particular may feel that they have 'lost' you, and that you are no longer the same child that they brought up. Perhaps they feel that you have betrayed them by selecting a different life for yourselfhttp://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution8.html#solution8

Your family may think that you have become a Muslim because of someone else, and not because you really believe it.http://www.convertstoislam.com/Coping/solution9.html#solution9

Now inshaAllah you feel more prepared, so how do you go about telling your family?

Who to Tell?


When I use the word 'family' this is referring to whoever you decide. For myself, I was concerned with telling my parents and my brother about my change of religion. Telling other family members was something that to me was not as urgent, but would be necessary in time. I felt that I wanted to gain the understanding and hopefully the support of my parents prior to tackling anyone else. For others though, they may have other family members that they would want to talk to first. Perhaps an aunt who you feel is open minded and receptive to new ideas, who in fact, may help you talk with your parents. Or perhaps a brother or sister would be easier to tell initially before talking to your parents. This is just something to consider.

What Method to use to tell your family?

The actual method of telling your family really comes down to the relationship that you have with them. Have you always had a relationship that allows the free and easy discussion of any topic? Or is your relationship good, but discussions of topics that might rock the boat are rare? Or perhaps you feel you have a not so good relationship with them.

Face to Face Conversation

I would advise the best method is to just sit down and talk to them in an environment that will allow them to express their views freely, ie talk to them privately, somewhere where they and you feel comfortable. This will allow for a conversaton to take place, giving them the opportunity to ask questions and you the opportunity to get across the main points that you feel are important. I know you may feel that you want some of your muslim friends with you, but this may stifle your family's reaction, they may not feel they can ask questions about the religion in front of a muslim audience for example.
A face to face conversation also gives you the opportunity to observe their real reactions and body language, something that will be lost with a telephone call or letter.


A Letter

If you feel that you are unable to talk to your family face to face then writing a letter is an option to consider. A letter has the advantage of allowing you time to write and re-write until you are happy that you have expressed yourself in the best possible way. You have the opportunity to make sure that you include everything that you want and that the best possible wording is used.

The disadvantage is clear, you can niether see nor hear their initial reactions. The reaction that you receive will be a delayed reaction, ie when you next see your family, or when they have read and digested your letter they will phone you. A lot can be learned from witnessing their initial reaction, although some may prefer to only get a reaction once the family have had some time to contemplate what you have told them.

You might want to consider telling your family face to face, but afterwards leave them with a letter that you had previously prepared. This would ensure any points that you were not able to convey during the conversation, were not missed altogether.


A Phone Call

This method does not really apply too well to individuals who still live with their family. Going out of the house to then phone back to the house to tell them, only then to return to the house later, does not seem the best option Smileyface
For those living apart from their family, this could be considered. However, if the family live relatively close by then I would suggest telling them face to face, rather than down the phone, and only consider the phone in the cases where family live at a distance and visits are few and far between.
Using the phone to tell family still involves having to talk to them, so if possible, going the extra step and telling them face to face would be better. The phone obviously stops you seeing their reaction, it is not always easy to get a true understanding of someone's real feelings down the phone. I feel that a phonecall to talk to your family about such a matter could also trivialise the issue, which is obviously highly important in your life.
However, if this is the method that you feel suits you best, then of course do it this way.

When it comes to telling other family members then a phone call or a letter could be the best option and the easiest in some cases.

Clearly this is an individual choice and there is no right or wrong. You must go with the option that you feel is best for you. Remember in many cases the reaction from family is very good, and in all cases, whatever the reaction, you will feel a sense of relief from simply telling them.


What to Say?

When you are telling your family take the time to explain to them that you have made a decision in your life, explain that it is an informed decision that you have made for yourself. You can explain some of your reasons for selecting Islam. If appropriate you can thank them for bringing you up in such a way that you have an interest in religion in the first place. You can address any possible concerns that you think they may have. You can reassure them that you are still the same person, and that you will be trying to lead a life of high morals and manners, a life that you hope will make them proud. You might decide to explain a little about how your life will change from now on.
I would suggest not going overboard with your words. Remember the main objective here is to let them know of your decision and to add some words that will help them to accept your decision and inshaAllah be happy for you. It is not the objective to explain all the Islamic teachings and convert them with your words, this can come with time inshaAllah.

Whichever method you choose to tell your family this has to be an individual choice of words. You will know the best way to approach the subject with your parents. At the very least you are prepared, you have considered what some of their concerns might be, and you have thought of some possible solutions to these concerns. For example, if they are worried that women are treated badly in Islam, then you can explain the reality to them. So as far as you are able, you are ready to deal with any misgivings they might have.

Don't try and 'over prepare'. Don't spend too much time thinking 'what if they say this..', 'what if they say that..'. Don't get too caught up in this beforehand, you will find that once you start talking to them your words will flow naturally with the help of Allah (swt).

Remember, there is nothing wrong in not knowing the answer to a question. If your family ask you a question and you do not know the answer, simply aknowledge the question and let them know that you are not totally sure and that you would like to find out for certain and then get back to them. This could actually be an ideal opportunity to enable you to bring up the topic of religion at a future date.


How to act during the discussion with your family.

As a muslim you will of course be trying to conduct yourself in accordance with Islam. You will be aware of the manners that a muslim must try to show etc, you will be aware of the qualities of patience and understanding. Most importantly you will be aware of the rights of your parents and the way in which you should treat them.

Remember that you should not raise your voice to your parents. Just show them love and kindness throughout the discussion. If there are times when a debate starts, as is often the case when discussing religion, remember to speak calmly and softly, and remember to keep smiling Smileyface

Despite your sincerity, you may still feel a little nervous at the start. Your nerves may give an incorrect impression to your family, so try to remain calm and composed, and inshaAllah the strength of your faith will see you through your tough times.


Giving your family books

You may want to have a couple of books to hand so that if appropriate you can offer them to your family at the end of your discussion. InshaAllah they will be interested to increase their understanding of the path you have chosen.
Obviously, if you fear that they will disrespect the books, then ensure that you do not give them any that contain the Quran.


We Need Your Help to Help Others

Please, if you are experiencing family problems that are not discussed on this page, or the advice given here does not go far enough to solve your problem, and you feel that you need some extra help then

please email us, we want to help you if we can.

Please, if you feel that you want to talk to another convert and gain strength from one another then please email us, we will put you in touch with other converts, or we would be very happy to become email friends with you ourselves.

If you have already talked to your family and you have a success story to share then please let us know how you got on. We would also appreciate receiving your helpful hints for others.

If you have come through the experience of telling your family and would like to help others then may Allah (swt) reward you for your kindness.


Please email us and we will link you up.

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Aminah.alqaem.org
www.aminah.shiahosting.com





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